I stay up till one to five in the morning doing dumb shit. And what do I get? Dumb Grades.
My life sucks.
This world we live in is a screwed up place ladies and gentlemen. This is even apparent in Junior High. You have the popular crowd who think they are better than everyone else. You have the jocks, who believe they can be assholes to everyone, even calling a girl a whore openly. Then you have the outcasts like me. We don’t fit in anywhere. We just take up space. That’s the hardest part about joining a new school. Unless the “cool” kids accept you when you join, making friends will be the hardest part of being there.
I once had a friend who came over my house just to hang out with his other friends who live near me. This is the story of how I found out. I will be Jack (not my real name), the other kid who I found from with be Sam, and the asshole will be Steve.
Sam: “Yo, Steve is an asshole.”
Me: “Why he is kind of my friend.”
Sam: “Well he went to us and said ‘I don’t like Jack can I hang out with you guys instead?’ So we said ‘No you’re an asshole don’t talk to us.’”
See? Never trust friends, they may be assholes.
I don’t mean to be selfish, but my life is a living hellhole. Everyday I come home, scared of my father, because if he finds out about my grades, he will force my hand here.
Some days I wish he would beat me. But he doesn’t. He verbally whips me. Some days I wish I could just run away and be done with my “great” family. If found out I may have depression. And if I told anyone, they would not believe. No one believes anything they don’t see or feel. Something they don’t believe in. Something that isn’t tangible to them. And such describes the […]
I love my family although sometimes I get sad and believe life for them would be better off without me.
There has been more than one occasion of me trying to end my life. When I was 10 I almost ended my life due to my parents’ fucked up expectations. Mostly I didn’t do to me being too much of a scared baby. Almost 3-4 times per week sometimes I think about either running away or commiting suicide. My grades are fucked up. Every week I get yelled at by my parents basically saying I’m not good enough for anything. I have no friends in a […]