its seemed like an non ending illusion ,once i opened my eyes i realized that all what was before ,was nothing but a wrong conception ,i chose to suffer and let my my soul and all these false ideas to consume on my spirit .
it took me like four years to know where am i heading to ,four years of hurting and blaming myself for things i didnt do
but now i think its the time for me to end it ,and make a decesion ,which is like this :
becaus i i ll find release when Death comes to take me someday […]
dear friends, yesterday was very bad ,bad today is even worse.everytime im outside i feel like sinking in that sea of sadness ,im such a tiny creation in a huge world ,and in the middle of the crowd i walk alone witha noticable weary face
sometimes while im walking my tears would be falling down and i cant hold them from falling ,but i become so afread from other people s looks ,because i have always wished to be strong ,carefree and self confident ,i never understand why i cant acheive that .this is not the only thing i question myself about everyday […]
today i spent whole day sleeping,after taking my ketotifen drink i woke up 12 o clock my head spining and so drowsy i didnt do anything ,just hearing mom s nagging ,they kept asking me whats wrong ,thought that if i drink it i ll sleep more but it was just half cup ,im feeling even bad .
im new to this website, actually i dont have any suicidal intention ,yet im really in need to leave this world to somewhere better ,somewhere i wont see any humans .things are really getting bad evry year no progress in any side in my life .its been like 6 years now ,evryday i wake up i just wonder why do i have to go through all of this pain ,every day pass without me not crying and feeling helpless ,im not thinking of suicide at all because i beleive in my relegion .i cant see anything good on this earth everything depress me ,im so […]