So. Tonight I was the closest I’ve ever gotten to finally killing myself. I mean it’s been maybe 8 months since I came to the conclusion that I needed to die, yet all I have to show for it are some fading scratches on my arm. It’s also been only a little bit shorter since I’ve started cutting myself – not so much because it made me feel better, but to get used to the pain and basically practice. I have to admit though, it usually did make the pain go away for the moment – except today. I made a deliberately deeper cut than […]
My dads’ cousin just hung himself. I’m not going to the funeral – I met him maybe once and barely remember him. Yet it makes me feel… I’m not even sure what. Sad doesn’t quite cover it.
I’ve been thinking about suicide myself for several months now (have considered it many times before, but this is the longest prolonged period where it has seemed the only solution). I guess that just always makes me feel sympathetic to those who do go through with it. More than a year ago an actor, rather famous in my country, killed himself. I wasn’t all that much of a fan of […]