I’m 52 soon. I used to be very upset that I didn’t get the life that most people I grew up with got (partners, children, career, friends)
I have learned to accept this. Of course I’m too much of a human wreck to work which I suppose I should be grateful for. I spend most of my time with distractions like reading watching documentaries and sport and chatting on the net. Still I feel that my life is empty and because I don’t work I don’t feel part of society, which is a horrible feeling.
I see the awful jobs people have to do and wonder how society carries on. We have created a finely tuned hell haven’t we? People spend most of their lives doing soul destroying jobs and they have to get up early every morning to slave away to sustain a life that’s barely worth living.
God knows how they do it.
There won’t be any sex for me. I have begun to see humans as pretty disgusting creatures and don’t want anything to do with them.
I expect to develop Alzheimer’s as I have lived a life of isolation and severe depression.
Thanks for reading this. I just felt I had to collect a few thoughts and write them down.