I’ve been pretty happy lately.
I’m doing a childcare course now trying to keep myself busy but today was a bad day….
Everything is just getting to me and I feel like I can’t handle it, I don’t want to see a doctor because I don’t want people to know how I’m feeling at the moment, my family have enough problems…
So yeah back to talking to you guys, It’s been so long I forgot my username and had to search for one of my old posts…Â I have a feeling I’m going to be here more often in future though. 🙁
Nothings getting easier but I think I’m slowly getting stronger.
The mood-enhancing properties of chocolate are well known in both the Muggle and wizard worlds. Chocolate is the perfect antidote for anyone who has been overcome in the presence of Dementors, which suck hope and happiness out of their surroundings. Chocolate can only be a short-term remedy, however. Finding ways to fight off Dementors – or depression – are essential if one is to become permanently happier. Excessive chocolate consumption cannot benefit either Muggle or wizard.
“Just a few more weary days and then, I’ll fly away.
To a land where joy shall never end, I’ll fly away.
I’ll fly away, O Glory, Â I’ll fly away. (In the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, bye and bye, I’ll fly away.”
“What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt”
Well that’s about it, I hurt everyone who ever gets close to me, maybe I should just stay away from people and save them the pain, I’ve pretty much fucked my life up already and I don’t know what I can do to change it. I hate myself, I hate my life and what I’ve done, I just hate myself.
Last night I had the strangest dream I’ve ever known before
I dreamed that all the world agreed to put an end to war
I dreamed I saw a mighty room, the room was filled with men
And the papers they were signing said they’d never fight again
And when the papers were all signed, and a million copies made
They all shook hands and bowed their heads and grateful prayers were prayed
And the people in the streets below were dancing round and round
While swords and guns and uniforms lay scattered on the ground
Last night I had the strangest dream I’ve ever known before
“In the end
As you fade into the night
Who will tell the story of your life
And who will remember your last goodbye
Cause it’s the end and I’m not afraid
I’m not afraid to die”
I’ve been really angry and full of hate lately, It makes me feel like crap when I take my issues out on the people I’m close to because nobody knows about the thoughts I’ve been having except the people on suicideproject and one person I know who doesn’t talk to my family and friends, I guess because they don’t know how I feel they don’t get why I’ve been […]
Keep it in your head *****, you can’t do it yet, your grandma is still alive and your sister is little.
Sitting in bed drinking alone listening to a day to remember…
yep… life is so good… =/
A Day To Remember – Have Faith In MeÂ
I love this song!
I had a good day so I thought I’d share one of my happy things… 🙂
Today is going to be a good day, I have something to look forward to so its gonna be easy to get to the end of today back to bed, my happy place, in the hope the world will end while I’m asleep or at least I’ll suffocate in my pillows and blankets…. I Miss You <3
I feel like shit, I don’t want to feel like this, I’ve been going so well now I feel like I’ve gone so backwards it’ll take forever to get back to where i was at emotionally, I’m a wreck, My family life is so fucked at the moment even my 12 year old sister is hurting herself and I don’t know how I can help her, I want to stop her getting like I did… I’m so lost and confused and I can’t stop crying whenever I’m alone, which is a lot recently…
I’m even grammar nazi’ing my writing so i can try not to think […]
Every day I hold back tears,
Because there’s only one reason I’m here,
I pretend I’m okay,
And try hard to stay,
But nobody knows because nobody cares,
And when I need help no one is there,
I wish I was normal,
And I act immortal,
But when no one is around,
I sit and cry on the ground,
I feel hopeless,
And just lose focus,
I don’t want to bleed,
But everyday i feel the need,
To pick up the knife,
And just end my life,
So far i’m winning,
But I’m near the end my hope is thinning,
Soon I’ll give up,
And I’ll just fuck up,
Till then my skin is clean,
But my luck is like a slot machine,
I can’t win,
Soon I’ll commit the […]
I don’t know if I should be here (This site) Only because I haven’t hurt myself in around 5 years, but lately I’ve been feeling exactly how I did when I was 13-16 (20 now), I just don’t really want to live anymore, (Already crying) I just can’t help it, whenever I’m alone I have to fight to keep myself from either bursting into tears or picking up the knife for the first time in years, I feel so helpless and I don’t know what to do, I want to see a counselor but I don’t really like telling my life story to new people every week […]