I am waiting for my parents to pass away before I do the deed. I do not want them to suffer the death of their child, so I am holding on for a little bit longer. At some point, this has been my reason to live. Am I selfish? Yes. Am I considerate? Yes. I have a sister, who has no idea about any of my plans. Before, I kill myself, I will tell her in advance. I don’t want her to be shocked. Same for my best friend.