I found this cite a few days ago. I keep thinking about what to write and I’ve decided to just start with my thoughts. I was google-ing suicide quotes and depression quotes when I found this cite. Do I think about suicide? I’m not sure. I don’t think I actually want to die. I just want to cause self – harm. I remember being 15 and talking to a psychologist because so much had happened and my way out of things was with a razor. I remember liking the feeling of running it across my wrists or thighs and watching blood drip. I never did […]
Empty means containing nothing, according to the dictionary. It’s the feeling that I have right now. It’s weird. I’m in my house, but i’m not alone. I have my daughter sitting next to me watching a movie on her iPad while I sit on my couch typing these words. She’s too little to understand my feelings and body language. I have messages on my phone that i’ve looked at, but can’t seem to reply. I have close friends that want to hang out or come over and call it a movie night…but why do I just want to be alone? I’ve thought about over-dosing today…actually […]
I’ve been extremely tired all day. All i’ve wanted to do is sleep. Sleep and not wake up. Just dream the night away. If it happens to be a nightmare…it’s okay because i’ve master lucid dreams. But it’s 1:25AM and I’m wide awake. The part before drifting away to the dream state is the hardest for me. It’s when all these thoughts come to my mind. All these people that have hurt me. All the words I’ve been told. All this negativity I seem to reminisce about. I want it all to go away! I hate hurting because of all the BS i’ve caused myself. […]