Went to my friendly Pa for my monthly 7 min Med check up. He changed up one of my meds I hate when he does that. Ever since he did that to me the first time I saw him. ( He took me cold turkey off two pretty strong meds, and doubled ones I said were not affective) ever since then he has earned the name of ‘Quack’ on my caller ID. But anyway, he takes me off ambian, I had been have a little trouble sleeping, but, still, nature of the beast, you know. I I’d not ask for different Med.He puts […]
I woke up today and wished again that my attempt had not failed. The meds make me feel fuzzy, at times they make me shake, people looks at me and despise me because they think I am on drugs or alcohol. I am tired, but jittery all the time. I hate the meds, I want my life back the way it used to be or I want out. This frustration is unendurable.
My husband just turned and looked at me and asked when i would be normal again. I could not say because everyone I have talked to in mental health has recoiled so fast you would think I had just pulled a pickled herring out of my coat and offer to bludgeon them with said fish.
I wonder why. They say Depression is very treatable once caught, but then they act like you have almost a life sentance.
And it is hard on the people when are used to having a sweet submissive wife who is trying to be Superwoman, and now […]
It has been four months since my attempt. I feel muzzled and constrained, i have no family except my husband and children, they are too young to understand and i do not ever intend for them to know. There is so much I want to talk about, things and people i expeirenced while in hospital for 20 days. But I have been forbidden to talk about it. My husband has had a long standing rule I am not supposed to say things to him longer than a paragraph. But on this I can not make any reference at all.Ever. He told his family who now […]
In a fleeting glance I look normal. I have two great kids under 7. I volunteer at school, teach a after school art class, president of PTA. I cook wholesome and tasty meals, bread and cookies to die for. My husband is a physics professor and we have been married 10 years.
I scrapbook, write, read and jog/bike. I meditate and do yoga. Until three months ago I also worked 3 jobs, most at night when kids were asleep or at school so I could be home with the kids. I did play dates, taught my children French and sign language.
Then one night I […]