I just cut myself for the very first time, I had been thinking of doing this for a while but never did. Tonight it all was too much and I did it and it was AMAZING, the feeling of the reason on my skin and the slight burning sensation as it broke it apart. The little blood that came out was like the reward for a good job and I can’t wait to do so again.
I emailed my ex after 2 years of not talking to him at all. He answered my email and it made my day. Then I wrote back and it’s been like 12 hours and nothing… I check my email every half hour I’m going crazy waiting to hear back from him. I still love him he was my first love and till this day no one can make me feel as good as he did. I wrote to him when I was feeling real bad, he use to be the person I called when I had my dark thoughts. I want him to say he […]
I’ll seek you out,
Flay you alive
One more word and you won’t survive
And I’m not scared of your stolen power
See right through you any hour
I won’t soothe your pain
I won’t ease your strain
You’ll be waiting in vain
I got nothing for you to gain
So I had me an hour of sleep, awesome. Got to plaster on some emotions so I can blend into this dark landscape that’s my life and carry on one more day.
I’m getting  drunk at the moment. Need to talk to someone about everything , I have someone I can talk to but I’ve never told anyone that I’m suicidal…. What would they think of me?
I want to fade away. There is very little of me already I’m an empty shell in fact if I wato full it would be of pain but sadly (no pun intended ) that shit won’t do you any good. Idk how I’m going to do it but it will be soon.