It’s dumb. Being gay or trans makes you a target. I have so much respect for Brandon. He was a cool guy, wish I could’ve met him. The way the cop handled his rape case reminds me of how I was treated when I went through rape, or someone showing up with a car after putting stuff in my house. Oh, and on a small level, how I’m treated over the 911 song, or the violent comps. How Gaga/Teen Mom 2 was using “Lee” “Harley” as an excuse to say drink poison when I vented on here. My point is, being gay means […]
Snakebite vs gunshot.
I’m not accepting this anymore. Any of it. I’m tired of this painful, lonely life. Everyone hates me now, for no reason. (Supposedly) You know, I read that Gaga was pretending her name was Lee… My dad’s name was Lee. I found him when he died. I just thought it was a coincidence how at ThyssKru, “Joe” said nobody cares if you drink poison… Just nevermind. A spiderweb virus didn’t do that too, did […]
I wouldn’t trade these days for anythinggggg. I’m so grateful.
I have more interviews coming up. Today, I think I bombed one. I didn’t prepare and froze. It wasn’t anything huge. It feels better getting out of the house. A new face. I enjoyed it. I was lightly laughing at myself inside. Haha, improv, not my thing.
I drank poison a couple days ago. I feel small. I feel embarrassed. I feel exposed. That Gaga spread so many rumors about me because she felt like it. And said “Drink it” when I confessed how I […]
Welp, nevermind.
I hate that you have to drink a whole bunch of it for it to work. I probably only have one attempt left in the bottle.
Saw this one b!tch in a bonnet and had to be like “camels and Chihuahua, chihuahua on mug, camels and chihuahua”
(Looked like that Holocaust lady from the Whoopi Goldberg reaction)
She was like D:<
so I was just 0_0 “mk here we go”
Imagine my face with a camera crew and her talking me out of it. I’d smirk and lie, definitely. Someone […]
To have it stolen, to steal from others, that I requested help but look at this. It changes the playback each time I replay it. Even in a matter of 1 second. Her dad showed up at my work, and said, nobody cares if you drink poison. I think the message is clear. I should’ve filmed it. It’s like accepting death, because I’m constantly told I’m subhuman. There isn’t a tomorrow. Everyone’s a bunch of copies. And she put that on White Sands. “You’re ugly, Did I?” To stab me for being on here and believing in her? She did that for so long. Just […]
If you numbed a psychopath’s whole body, and gave him a bunch of pot, and broke his bones in front of him, what would it look like. Or made him watch his skin burn. Would he just sit there and go :0 like a TikTok or…
You’d have to shoot if he yelled or made threats. What would talking a way out look like? I’m picturing a comedy.
Another family member died. I feel like it’s my time, too. There really isn’t a tomorrow. It’s going to be like this forever.
It’s crazy how callous the world is. How people are able to notice extreme suffering and not offer to help. Spitting at them, instead. I don’t want to do it anymore. It isn’t worth it. As everyone says, I’m not worth it. What does the elderly mean to the nasty rich, with all the power in the world? When that stuff is the last sound they hear. How can nobody care after being told about it? That’s all I did was wait for […]
Our family lost a beautiful, energetic, kind, compassionate and lovely soul on July 5, 2023. Hannah Marie Eddington Lamb, born February 21, 1992, passed away unexpectedly at the age of 31. Hannah was born in Little Rock, raised in Benton, Ark. and lived in Nashville, Tenn. She was an intelligent, curious, caring, strong willed, and loving daughter, sister, wife, mother, teacher and friend. She loved dancing, playing with her daughters, reading, singing, and playing board games at family gatherings. Hannah had a gift […]
I keep thinking about the girl from Arkansas, the strangers who cried for her, wishing they could have somehow known and opened their heart to her.
I do, too. I understood, I’m in the same dark room. I attempted in March, and felt freedom watching my skin turn pale as it flooded my bloodstream. My lungs, the caves in my […]
I’ve been thinking about you. Wondering if you’re happy and healing, out there. You subtly vanished. And that’s ok, as long as nothing bad happened to you. I read your stuff and rooted you on. I’m here if you come back. Actually, I’ll probably always be here, like a regular in a bar. Or a god damn janitor.
7/5/2023
What a shitty day.
We’re on our way to Dallas. After driving through a town in arkansas, we noticed a woman’s body partly covered with tarp. She was lying face down with her arm extended, her palm flat on the ground. The jet black hair from the back of her head. The officials on scene tried concealing the incident with a curtain of tarp, but did a half ass job. Everyone could see her on the other side of traffic. The dumb fucking officials have no respect at all. My friend was traumatized and couldn’t stop thinking about how her skin was ashen and gray. He’d […]
I miss her so much. I wish I could hold her. The girl in this reminds me of her. I’d call her, but she’s always so angry. I like hearing that she’s doing well. No self harm. Going out, making friends. Heals me.
My power’s out. Gonna be holed up here for awhile. My dogs love it here. If they’re happy, I am. A black retriever and border collie. I love how they smile.
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I commented that Gaga was trash for comping “drink it” when I said I was drinking poison bc of all the hate she spread. She really should fuel up on coke, booze and […]
Through the years, I’ve been dreaming about returning to the house I grew up in. It’s up for sale again. Painful, you know. I just close my eyes and the memories flood in. I want it back so badly.
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