Anyone regret either doing something or not something where the results/consequences were life altering? Like you were stupid and made the wrong decision?
I didn’t do the usual things that most ppl do to fuck up their lives like drugs or alcohol but something stupid and I can’t go back in time to undo it.
Like something that caused permanent physical damage kind of thing. Like a suicide attempt or deep cutting or anorexia type of thing (no I did not do those) but along those lines. Where it permanently damaged you? (No that’s not the cause of my initial disability)
What if we accidentally fucked ourselves up bc we did something not smart / chose the wrong decision? With permanent damage and there’s no going back? Yes something that shortened my life.
I’m not averse to being dead but I do mind being sick for years or decades before I die. And I stupidly damaged my health further (was already sick to begin with).
What do you do if we dud something that fucked us up? It’s not like it’s so easy to be like “don’t worry, don’t be so hard on yourself” when the consequences are that you fucked up your health (unintentionally). And you knew it could happen but you ignored it abd did it anyway?
How do we not beat ourselves up? Or not lament our dumbass decision? Or not think about it?
3 comments
First I was thinking about my own regrets…but then it sort of runs in my family. All of my family members are like me…we’re smart and sometimes made great decisions but then terrible ones as well.
We’re also risk-takers and it helped my dad and siblings did very well…my mom and I have not had the same luck…but hoping I can fix that this year.
Often times you don’t realize if you make a decision you’ll regret it later. Most of them are the kind you can walk away from and there’s no lasting damage.
However some rare decisions are destructive to your life. I had some troublemaker friends in my late teens, and I should’ve avoided them like the plague…even my other friends warned me and I didn’t listen.
I was actually more rebelling against my dad who was strict and didn’t want me going out often. These guys got into trouble and I was tagging along and paid the price for it. Ofc I learned my lesson but yes it created issues for me.
What I regret even more is not taking chances on dating when I should’ve. Only because there’s very little to lose and so much to gain to hit on a beautiful girl. But that was tied to my insecurity and being lower income.
But frankly if you don’t feel good about yourself, it’s very hard to convince others to like you also…you have to be in a good place in life to have the confidence to approach others. Some people can fake it, but I’ve always been about being real, authentic with others.
While most of the good and bad things now are in the distant past, this is really not a life I would’ve chosen if given the option and knowing what I’d have to suffer through.
It’s just not good enough for me to ‘almost’ have had a great life…it’s all or nothing. Ofc it circles back mostly to a good income and being middle class or better.
Money would’ve changed everything and I think I would’ve had a great life…it doesn’t even take a lot of money…just enough to be comfortable, have a house and disposable income to date, travel and be confident in yourself.
at least you have your mom. my mother is a cold callous narcissistic person. she’s like your dad but 10x worse. and yes, very abusive too, physically and mentally. and no, my dad was bad too.
it makes a difference when you have at least ONE person out there who cares and loves for you vs NO ONE. when there’s no one in the world to where your existence matters, life isn’t worth living (except out of spite).
you’re lucky you have that.
Oh ya, my dad’s a fcuking sociopath, I lived with him for a short while (on and off)….he has his good moments but can turn on you in a split second and become an evil monster-esp. when I was younger.
Luckily I was able to move back to my mom’s place who was way more chill and sensible. What a mistake she made hooking up with this selfish, crazy moron.
I’m sorry to hear neither of your parents were any good, that you could find some peace with. I’m amazed that you were able to put up with so much suffering and keep going on.
I guess we all realize as teenagers either we put up with our parents crap or we end up on the street. I also knew if I started working FT early with no education, I’d always be stuck with menial jobs…so I made sure to do whatever I could to get my degree.
Thanks, I wish you had a great mom too…it would’ve made your life better for sure. The other option for girls is to find a decent man who’s willing to help you achieve your dreams.
But I think that’s in the past now…so many guys today are immature as.sholes and then there’s that whole MGOW movement and anti-feminism which makes it worse.
I am traditional in that sense…I would absolutely help out my gf in her education/career…I mean it’s just common sense to me. Of course provided you’re in a serious LTR and that I know she’ll be there for me when I’m going through hardship, joblessness, etc.
I’m assuming you still have the same struggles with health and income. Here in Canada at least we have free health care for the most part…I know it’s way harder in the US.