I wish I knew what’s wrong with me – I think I may have started a few posts with that line before! I need a rant, and a good long cry, and some sort of an answer from whichever celestial being might be listening. I have been single for a long time, now I have a fantastic boyfriend. He tells me everyday that I’m beautiful, yet I can’t allow myself to believe him. I’m convinced that he’s too good for me. He loves me, and he wants to marry me – yet I find myself fighting the urge to cut, and I have so many […]
what’s wrong with me?finally things are starting to look up – I have some money, and a boyfriend who adores me. Yet I fell into my ex-boyfriends arms today, knowing it was wrong, I feel like cutting again, and I’m craving a drink. Why am I so self-destructive?
What’s the point of going on? Today everything seems hopeless. I cried for close on three hours today. I finally turned to a friend for some sort of comfort, and basically got turned away because he’s too busy. Can’t talk to family because they don’t understand. Or they pretend to understand and be supportive for a few days, then they go back to being disappointed in me. I’m basically alone, with life going on all around me, and I’m just stuck. I’m not making any progress in life, what successes I do have are brushed aside as not being important enough. I’m lonely all the […]
“You so disappointing, you aren’t married yet. Everyone else is getting married but you aren’t.”
Well thanks for being so supportive, mother.
:-/
That pretty much sums up my evening. (Just a random post, felt like talking to someone, but I have no one to talk to!)
I haven’t come here for a long time, but this evening is just too much for me. More than anything, I need someone to take care of me tonight. I’m in so much of pain (physical) that I can barely stand or walk. I’m hungry, but I don’t have it in me to actually do something about it. I’ve been feeling so lonely recently, and this physical pain is making the emotional pain worse. I would love to have someone take care of me for a change, rather than me being the one that helps everyone else. But tonight, I am reminded just how alone […]