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Again.

by JiminyCrispies
by JiminyCrispies

I did try to do it. A few pills too many. Vertically down. Left the blood to spill. And laid down to die…

And yet, I’m still here.

I cried when my alarm woke me up; I just don’t want to be here anymore.

I checked my arm in the morning, now it was light and I had my glasses on to see properly.

They weren’t deep. Again.

I can’t understand, why wasn’t it enough? I pressed and pressed as the blade was in my skin, right above the vein. i made multiple cuts, just to make sure.

And yet I’m still fucking here.

Why won’t anything kill me?!

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What Now?

by PainNlife
by PainNlife

I had been planning my suicide for months….

Researching methods…

Throwing away my possessions and clothes…

Writing my note…

Coming up with a good plan…

Then the day slowly rolled around and the closer it got… The more unsure I became….It was easy to tell myself in June that I would die in November….It liberated me from all my worries about the future… “knowing” I was going to die… I didn’t even attempt it…My heart wasn’t in it like last time….if I had tried to do it it would have been half assed and insincere…. I’m really angry with myself and I feel like an Idiot….All this fucking time WASTED […]

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Failure at the game of life

by cyranodb
by cyranodb

That’s how I feel.  At age 43 I don’t see my life as one worth continuing.  I’m stuck in a dead end job in a legal career I never wanted.  I’ve been looking to find a new job just to get out of this office I’m stuck in but I either don’t get a response to my resumes or I can’t find anything I’m qualified to apply for.

My career is a total failure.  I don’t make enough money to live on my own in one of the most expensive cities in the world, so I’m stuck living with my aging parents.

I’m completely isolated.  I have […]

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Why is it so hard?

by breathless
by breathless

I want to die, and not because I’m going through some ‘rough times’ or whatever, I’ve felt this way since I was at school.
I’m in my 20’s and I have mental health problems, manic depression, insomnia, amongst other things, I never have any energy nor feel happiness.

 

I feel like life isn’t for me, it’s all too hard when I think of it all, it’s so daunting and I just don’t have the energy for it. I can’t hold down a job because of my insomnia, so what’s the point of living? I’m not wired properly to ever be happy and I’ll always have problems doing normal […]

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my husband

by LizzyC96
by LizzyC96

To my husband,

who just saved my life this morning. I was going to take a bottle of pills.

All I want to do is to something worthwhile. The job that I worked so hard to get, has lost it’s meaning.

Feel like I’m being forced to pound harder and on the rocks all day. I never build anything. My rocks are wonderfully

hideous when complete. Neatly stacked back to the bottom of the pile, waiting to be hacked away again by somebody else.

 

 

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by furrball
by furrball

I used to cut, but I recently stopped because I made a promise to my friend. And honestly speaking I don’t even have an urge to cut anymore. It’s much worse. I can’t stop thinking about killing myself. I even tried overdosing on some random pills. But I guess I’m not very lucky. Every night I have this shitty feeling. I’m tired of myself. And worst thing is that I can’t talk to anyone about it, mostly because no one cares.

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i really want to die

by morgyn
by morgyn

I am 17 and I really want to die. I have done a lot of bad things in my life. I am really addicted to porn and I really do not know what to do know with my life. is it okay for me to die?

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I WANT IT TO STOP

by krissy1001
by krissy1001

im tierd of living its hard i cant keep going on i live a life of certin doom that i bring upon myself i dopnt know why i do it iguess i just cant stop hurting myself ive been raped ive been hit ive been hurt by everyone in my life . i just cant keep going.i feel the urg to cut and i cant stop hurting myself i just want out of my body.

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That first cut seems so innocent…

by Engeltje
by Engeltje

Just a poem I’ve written today which is I think pretty recognizable for people who cut. It’s the way I feel about it.

The first time,
it feels so innocent.
Just a small scratch.

But after a while,
you know that first cut wasn’t that innocent.

It was the beginning of an addiction,
that’s hard to beat.
And addiction that’s getting worse and worse.
There’s nothing left of that first little scratch.

The cuts you make now are much worse.
While you’re cutting,
you can see the skin tearing apart.
You can feel the stinging pain,
of your knife that’s cutting in your skin.
You […]

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Just Stop!

by enola
by enola

It could’ve been a lot worse. I could’ve had a life like you, and you, and you…

 

What is it?? Do I really have a warped mind? Am I sick? Do I need someone else’s help? Am I simply ungrateful? Lazy? Stupid? Ill-intentioned? What is wrong with me?? Why am I this way???

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My tragedy

by Swanadi
by Swanadi

Mera koe frnd ne h….jo ha wo padai ke wja se dur rhte ha…gf ha bt wo time ne dte .,….
ghar walo pe be bojh hu …….
simly totly brbd diperesd persn ned death

y i study for whom
me q kru mehnat

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I don’t know what to do

by nerevars
by nerevars

I’m tired, overwhelmed, uninspired, afraid, hurting, uninspired and I don’t know how to get past it. I might not even know what it is I’m trying to get past. I try something new only to spin my wheels. I’m living my life on repeat, with the same worn out patterns and themes playing again and again.

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Walking Peaceful

by iclazion
by iclazion

Walking peaceful, barefoot over the green cold grass valley, surrounded by trees, with the humming of butterfly wings, covering the trees like blossoms. Distrait minded, gliding slowly across the valley to nowhere. Flickering reminiscent images of agony and affliction that rotten my core, reminds me why I am here, nowhere.  Lifting my arms out stretched beside me, the swift wind passes all around me, almost like spirits touching and welcoming my soul.

Like brethren they whisper to each other. Overwhelmed with emotion the tears stream out of my emotionless eyes, and down to my chest where the wind flicks them into the air.   Yonder is a […]

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What you now believe

by G.W.
by G.W.

If suicidal thoughts are to be replaced with thought of life, a new thought system must be utilized; one with a new focus and a new goal. Such is A Course in Miracles. It is flexible, in that, it sees you where you are, as you are, as well as where you could be without the thought of death. It provides a workbook of lessons to train the student in how the shift of perception can be made. It does not force, but enables. It does not appeal to everyone, though it has a profound effect on those whom find it appealing. Here is the […]

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loosing you

by lissbabe
by lissbabe

im scared to cut again not because of the pain but because i might loose my boyfriend i love him sooo much but the thing is he wants me to get an abortion if i was pregnet and now he will leave me if i carry on cutting but i dont want to loose him so what shall i do to stop self-harm??

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No one to talk too.

by Justin2013
by Justin2013

No one understands me or the way I feel. I’m deeply depressed and cant tell anyone about it. I have so many things wrong with me.. I hate my self for who I am, I hide everything, because if I told someone they would think im crazy or a lunatic. Suicide is constantly on my mind, but who do I run to  when no one is there? I ask my self that every Day.

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