Going on here, I know I would never be able to commit suicide. I’m too much of a wimp to do it, and would only be able to do so purely on impulse depending on my mood and surroundings. But I still have suicidal thoughts. I don’t know why I’m here or what my purpose is for being here. I don’t belong anywhere. Ever since I was a child, I’ve felt like an outcast. I’ve never had a clique of friends I truly belonged to, and if there was, I wasn’t important enough to be invited to hang out, I was more the person they […]
Tag:
Barbie Doll
I miss him so much. I want my best friend back. I want to hug him and tell him just how much he means to me. I just want to see him again. I want so badly to see his bright blue eyes and blonde hair.
But I can’t.
He’s dead.
He would be ashamed of me. Drugs, alcohol, cutting, and my bitter attitude. Not much to be proud of.
There’s a part of me, though that thinks that he would be proud of me. I’ve been to hell and back, with both physical and emotional damages, but I’m still breathing. I can walk into a room and act […]
People just don’t understand that I’m slowly dying inside. That I feel like such a loser everyday. I’m not pretty. My two best friends, the only girls I hang out with, are super pretty and a perfect size 0 or 1. They are Barbie doll perfect. Ten there is me. I’m not pretty like them, and I am not tiny. Everyone tells me I have a nice body and I’m pretty, so why don’t I believe them? My self-confidence is so low. I just want someone there for me. My “best friends” don’t even realize when something is wrong with me. They just leave me […]
There is someone who bullies me. Someone who teases and taunts and tortures me. That bully is me.
No matter what I do, I notice a flaw in me. I’m stupid, ugly, fat, and friendless. No one listens to me. I doubt my parents even care about me. Whenever I try talking to them, they don’t even bother to understand my problems. I can’t talk to my brother. He has autism and wouldn’t understand anything. My ‘friends’ are fake, as fake as a Barbie doll. No matter how hard I try in school, there are always people who do better than me. I hate comparing myself […]
I lost myself in his eyes, I even told him I would marry him and have his baby. It wasnt good enough for him. He found love somewhere else, yet im the *****, im the WHORE, crying alone in the corner. Ive been a shattered jar for years and its never enough to have me apparently, I agree with his malice. Ive taken 27 pills and im really hoping that it works this time, I want to make him happy by saying goodbye. Im no longer a barbie doll, im no longer the apple of his eye. I love you Dean, see you again someday […]