So in my family, my parents are very crazy about what  I wear not my brothers just me. I have to wear long sleeved shirts and long pants no shorts no low cut shirts no tight clothing which I mean isn’t really bad but it gets annoying when I see all these girl in different styles and I can only wear long pants and long shirts(the shirts also have to fully cover my butt) I can’t wear high heels or make up and my  dad freaks when I do. Today I wore a shirt with a. V neck and my dad went ballistic he said […]
Tag:
Freaks
There’s a boy.I know you will probably skip this post because you don’t want to read the story of a broken hearted girl,but I will write it anyway because this is the book of my life and no one wants to read it.So I will write this story of love and blood here because this a story of a rock/goth/emo/satanic girl (or anyother names people use to call me) which secretly like a normal bo,you know,one of those cool guys that goes to parties and drink and probably think that my kind of girls must be burned alive or killed because they are freaks.What can […]
I’m a teenager, and I don’t know if I’m the only one who has noticed how “suicidal thoughts and actions” for example cutting ect. Has become for of a trend than an issue. People are uploading picture of their cuts or of failed suicide wounds practically everywhere for some sick reason the I don’t understand. Yet when someone who actually does have a issue comes forward they are cut down by these people for being ‘attention serking’ or ‘freaks’. I don’t understand this, can’t someone explain this?
This morning I woke up and I was so happy (NOT-.-) because it was Easter. I was half awake looked out the windows when I was downstairs and I saw snow. Snow?? No that’s not possible. I mean snow is already a miracle in The Netherlands if we have it in the winter, but on 31 march?? No, not possible. Somebody was joking on me, with a machine that makes snow, but when i saw that it was also high in the air slowly falling down I realized this was no joke. When I realized that, I got totally crazy, because I thought I was […]
Five hundred.
Five hundred and one.
Five hundred and two.
Five hundred and fifty.
Five hundred and sixty.
Five hundred and seventy eight.
The numbers are there, but I can’t help bursting into tears everytime I realize I’m not cutting deep enough. That I can’t. I know it’s a user problem but I blame my razor. The blades not sharp enough. That’s why I’m cutting so lightly. That’s why I haven’t been able to cut over a centimeter deep. I’d numb my leg like a post suggested, but that freaks me out.
It’ll never be deep enough. I’ll never be good enough to press harder. […]
I woke up this morning and couldn’t believe this is life. That this is the life I have to live. I can’t believe it although it’s there as real as it could be.
I think about the possibility of being somewhere else. In a different body. Different place. Maybe a little house near the sea. Maybe with someone I care about. But this is just a thought for a Sunday morning. I am aware that it could never happen and I honestly don’t want any of that. It’s just something to cover up the reality.
Actually it would be enough if I could just take a shower, […]
My life has infact, gotten no better. The exercise isn’t looking like anything has changed, I still hate my body. My friends are somewhat ignoring my issues because they make them uncomfortable. Because they never have anything to say to me, so they just smile sympathetically and soon enough it’s forgotten.
What I’ve discovered is that my father has been diagnosed with Bi-Polar, and this explains why he’s such a dick when only moments ago he would have been being lovely. But now, he wants to lean onto me. Because I’m his daughter, and the only thing he has left, I feel obligated to look after him, even though I’m […]
Science say’s when you die. It’s game over. Consciousness is produced by the brain. Religion say’s we have a soul. I say youwhat.? If there is a god why would it give us soul’s. Make us immortal.? & why would he love us. Let’s face it. Human beings are a bunch of freaks. Self obsessed selfish & self absorbed. Ok there are expressions but not for most..
I think i’m a  searcher.
Fall. Get up.
Run. They are –
Everywhere. No Escape.
And when i fall to my
Knees will
Someone come rescue me?
If I wasn’t already having a bad day.
Damn those stupid door knocking god thumping freaks.
You know nothing about me so who are you to call me a damn sinner and NO i don’t want you to leave me a bible and NO I don’t want you coming back next week to teach me to love a god that don’t bloody exist
I have the option of taking discounted driving lessons through school. I am one of the few people my age who flatly rejected this offer. I don’t want to learn to drive. There are a few reasons for this that I’ve explained to people- traffic freaks me out and I’m scared of somehow killing someone- but although both are true, the main reason I don’t want to drive is the temptation.
If I had a car and the ability to drive, it would be all too simple to purposely crash into a wall or something really fast (although I’d never let it kill another, I’d make […]
“How Nice To Feel Nothing, and Still Get Full Credit For Being Alive.”
by MilesToGo
written by MilesToGo
That’s a quote from one of my all time favourite novels, Slaughterhouse 5 by Kurt Vonnegut. I have plans to get the book’s mantra, ‘so it goes’, tattooed somewhere on my body.
Which, is kind of at odds with posting on a suicide website, isn’t it?
I don’t actually know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know if I’m depressed – I’ve never gone to a doctor or a counseller. I think about suicide on a near-daily basis; not in some abstract way, but with regards to methodologies, and having a suicide note on my laptop which I regularly update to correspond with the messages I want […]
101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks, and Other Outlaws ?
by supranaut
written by supranaut
Has anyone read this? It’s a book by Kate Bronstein.
congradulations dad. you fucked up again. getting married without asking me about it first… making us move into this bug infested disgusting thing you freaks call a house. the walls are rotted. there is no cell phone service. i have a tiny room compared to the one i had before. i have to leave my stuff shoved under my bed and crammed in the closet because there is nowhere to fit it all. your room is worse than mine. and you yell at me and ground me because my stuff “isnt where its supposed to be”. im sick of it. why do my thoughts suddenly […]
I had surgery two weeks ago after car crash and they used cadaver, a dead person’s body parts to keep me going. This totally freaks me out. Try getting that thought out of your head!