I will not kill myself. I can’t, I just have too much potential. However, I just have this urge to do it anyways. Half of the time, I want to live just to learn about the universe and the wonders of science. Yes, that is right. I only live in the name of science and the curiosity spectrum of my mind. But then half of the time, I tell myself that there is no incentive of living. Let me lay this down for you: I have amnesia (or maybe even Alzheimer at a relatively early age). My mind […]
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Half Of The Time
I could disappear right now and no one even care to notice that I was gone. I can be surrounded by tons of people and still feel like I don’t belong anywhere. Everyone seems to so much better off without me. Death seems more inviting then life. I’m not good at expressing my feelings, so I keep everything bottled inside. Half of the time I want to tell someone what I’m feeling, but I’m scared they will think I’m insane so I just keep quiet. I feel like I’m just not here at all. If somehow I have disappeared into the world. Lost. There is […]
…in that dark place. I fell out with my mum yesterday, I thought it was just another petty argument but she took it too far. She started ranting about how she can’t deal with my ‘problems’ any more (I have severe depression). She said that she understands why my brother doesn’t like me because half of the time I am horrible to him, only she didn’t mention the part about him sexually abusing my younger brother and sister (who were taken away) for three years. I don’t want to be here anymore, my mum doesn’t want me, nothing needs to be said about my brother, […]