WOOHOO! Finally, the one thing I have ALWAYS wanted is happening, and for real this time too! My parents are splitting up. I have been, mentally,emotionally, and even slightly physically abused but now it should be over right? Coz finally mum is going to save us from our so called “dad” errrerrrr. This is what happens when you expect to much from life. Life says wooah! Slow down there cowboy, I ain’t gonna let you off the hook that easily! Dad had officially gone crazy. If you’ve ever seen my posts then you will get a feel for how much a  phsycopath he is, but […]
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Hook
Im very young only 14 but you would never guess that Im 6 feet 3 inches and always was the big kid.  My parents sheltered me until i was 7 when my mother abandoned us.  I got depressed but i never let out untill my depression turned to rage i got into fights in middle school broke peoples ribs but got off the hook because i did very well in school one day i was blind sided and broke my foot that’s when i got introduced to oxycodone i got addicted it eased my pain and i calmed down i had to steal money from my dad to get the stuff I later  started regularly poping pills whether it […]
Fighting
In the boxing ring,
Fists held to my face,
Shielding myself from the blows headed my way.
I try and try so hard
Ducking, dodging, skirting away,
From the opponents coming my way.
Jab, hook, and cross
Side kick, front kick,
Knockdown.
On my back, looking up,
Dazed, startled, confused.
Panting, trying to catch my breath,
I wonder if it’s even worth it.
5,4,3,2…
Back on my feet,
Fists held to my face once more.
Kick, kick, kick,
Uppercut, jab, cross
In a blaze of aggression,
The round ends.
Gasping, sweating, blood trickles down my face
I try so hard to win,
But I just can’t fight any more.
I feel… dirty. All of my friends call me innocent but they don’t understand. They rely on me to help them through their issues and I always try but how am I supposed to help them if I can’t even help myself? I have… family issues. When I was about three, my family adopted four kids: Amanda, Jason, Jacob, and Anthony. Anthony would undress me and I’d always be to week and scared to stop him. He would sneak into my room at night and pin me down. He did this for more than half of my life. If it weren’t for my parents, he would’ve done it […]
my mom hung herself from a bike hook in the garage this sept. I miss her. she was in so much pain. she had no hope she talked to me and I talked and read and and we fought and she battled and i searched and she persevered but she couldn’t hang-on any longer. for anyone that is reading this and thinking about suicide please know that you are not alone. please know I care. please know my mom was lost too. please know that while I can accept how you may feel about the world and even yourself- the […]