It’s almost my birthday. I’m so depressed, I just think about dying.
Fake smiles, fake hugs. Nobody cares..
Tag:
nobody
I used to come on here all the time.
I’ve been, “fine” for a year now. Occasionally cutting & testing how many tablets I can take until I throw up. I lie to my CAMHs worker (councillor) about being okay.
I am fat & ugly. After years of abuse I don’t know how I lasted this long. A-levels are too difficult due to how depressed I am.
Now, I have taken a handful of sleeping tablets. I will take more.
Now, I’m going to take my own life.
I’m not sure why I’m writing this, maybe to distract myself from how I feel, depressed, light headed, paranoid, & my eyes […]
Ok so ik when i say i wanna kill myself.. nobodies gonna say shit because im not important anymore. Nobody fucking cares about me except maybe one person and im loosing her to her boyfriend. She says i have a perfect life and nothing is wrong with it, thats because i dont tell her everything.
I cut myself, so deep i couldnt pay attention to anything but that during school, i cry myself to sleep.. Every night, i never knew my real dad and i got my two foster Brothers taken away from me, my step dad ruins my life, so i was thinking, if […]
I know nobody here reads my stuff but i still write hoping it helps my thought process. I told him everything sat night and of course he didnt take me seriously. I even had the gun cocked and ready and he just ignored me then took the gun when i had laid it down because i was crying. The next day he put it back where i had it like nothing happened. Why doesnt anyone take me seriously? Or am i that much of a failure that i really wont succeed in taking my own life either and its that obvious i suck at everything […]
Sunday Night Ramble: Goals, gore and guilt. And fucking children. (Not literally, mind you)
by khajiit
written by khajiit
There is no goal that I have yet to discover that would possibly seem realistic, rational or even in the name of “good†whether that be for myself or for others, that would compel me to keep living.. I have never particularly strived to improve the quality of life for others so it is only selfish and hypocritical of me to complain about my own degraded, dull, lifeless existence.
The criteria and fulfillment that many people seem to have and encourage hold no meaning to me. I don’t see the motives or reason behind such actions or choices that would justify its rationality. One of these […]
I wear a smile well, it’s my best accessory
I do it because I know it’s necessary
Behind the smile it’s revealed I’m dying inside
And it’s amazing the world buys all the lies.
Nobody will ever know
That the pain doesn’t let me go
It will haunt me until the day I die
I don’t want my tears to stain the world outside.
Trapped in a world I’m not good enough for
What am I still doing here?
Only in death will I find some of bliss
I know that I won’t be missed.
It’s been at the back of my mind for a while. But now I’ve come to realise that it’s more than just suicidal thoughts. I’ve gotten to a point where I just have this really strong feeling that there’s something not right about me being alive. It’s not a result of bullying or any sort of trauma, it’s just a feeling, a really strong one. Over the past few weeks I’ve been putting myself through relatively dangerous “tests” to see whether I belong here or not. So far, I’ve survived them (clearly) but they’re not enough proof for me that I belong anymore. I just […]
My mom can get cancer again, and my dad left us without a home or money…I have no friends, my family wants me to go die…they all call me a demon…FUCK LIFE! I’m SICK of getting tortured and neglected by people who say they “love” me…WHATS THE MEANING OF LOVE??? LIFE??? I can’t live with this anymore…I”m DONE being the punching bag…I HAVE ATTEMPTED SUICIDE BEFORE…EVERYONE thinks I’m doing it for attention…EVEN MY THERIPIST…They tell me I’m a lying piece of shit…FUCK YOU! I’m only struggling! Why in the HELL would I fake this?! IT’S CALLED PAIN. My STEPDAD don’t give a FUCK about me…he […]
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