heavy duty shit in therapy yesterday. rejection, dismissal, self hatred etc etc. my psyche is fighting tooth and nail to keep some horrible thing secret. what that is i don’t know. saw the shrink last week. another appointment and a new script. losing faith in pharmaceuticals. there doesn’t seem to be anything out there for me. left the office angry and upset. felt rejected, dismissed, discarded. why exactly i don’t know. the doc didn’t do or say anything particularly egregious. it was like there was something i desperately wanted to communicate but i couldn’t find the words. then my 20 minutes was up. go away. […]
Tag:
Pharmaceuticals
You know what feels like it sucks the worst about depression and wanting to off yourself? It’s knowing that really, when you get right down to it, no amount of therapy, psychotropic pharmaceuticals or loving intervention-type talks with family and friends is going to “cure” you. You have to go through the pain of taking steps and accepting help and being receptive to the above to make yourself well when you really have stopped caring (or think you’ve stopped caring) whether you get well or don’t get well.