I want to die, but I don’t want to fuck it up. Helium hood, pills, slit wrists, even asphyxiation with semi suspended hanging and other variations, drowning….so much can go wrong i don’t want to wake up in the hospital with my world in even worse ruins. I’ve been there 8 times to date. I’m done with that. I don’t want sympathy, empathy, anything, I just want to die. I can’t get a hold of a secure source for cyanide or ******** as they can steal your money and leave you dry–already lost hundreds that way. I don’t know what to do. No subways where […]
Tag:
Slit Wrists
I’m probably being stupid, I keep thinking that the only reason that I should continue living is so that my family don’t end up hurt but I’m starting to question my theory. I found my release a week or so ago, cutting, it helped me a bit. Whenever I got shouted at for poor conduct at school or something, I’d concentrate on the pain and everything else would just go silent no matter HOW hard they scream at me, I just wouldn’t hear it. It’s become a routine, planning out and researching how to end my pathetic existence that can’t even affect society, if I […]
or it certainly seems and feels like I will.
I have had mental health problems for years now and I have always actively tried to help myself. I have always sought help and have been medicated for a long time. I think it was hard because I was never ill enough for it to be noticed by anyone but ill enough for it to interfere with my life daily.
I just hate myself. Every time I close my eyes, my mind is screaming for me to end it. I just cant do it any more and I have no other choice. I have never visualised myself being […]