The day he was born I no longer felt alone.
He was mine to protect.
I failed.
That night, he saw.
He saw my blood.
He saw my cuts.
He heard my tears.
My biggest failure of all: I failed him.
I have been cutting for about three months now. I cut my wrists, legs and stomach. I have been very good at hiding them, at least I thinks so, but now I have a problem. I’m sick therefore not going to school and left alone at home for the day. My mom’s friend is a doctor and my mom asked her to come over and check upon me, find out why I’m sick and how to recover. I’m so scared that the doctor is going to make me undress, because I’ve been to doctors loads of times before I started self harming and many times […]
I used to be able to close my eyes and imagine a story to the sound of a classical piece. Requiems were visual epics – battles of vanguard armies on the most desolate lands I’d seen in books and on the net. When I close my eyes now, there’s a convoluted series of blurs. The veterans of battle I used to see, crisp with lines of experience drawing down their brow and mouth, are now blurs. The music is focused too much into my reality, now. A requiem blows life into my memories, vivid, excruciating life. All the horror I have culminates into each crescendo; […]
Hi, I’m not going to tell you who I am, but I will tell you my beginning of how I started being suicidal.
So, It all started when i was 4 or 5. My mom drove me to my babysitter’s house and when we arrived there, I hugged her so tight and we played and stuff like that for an hour.. then she told me she was going to go outside for a few hours to garden like she does everyday, and so when she left, a few minutes later, A man came in and… he told me to follow […]
Woke up today and sobbed into my pillow. My son came to see me. He made me feel somewhat better. He should not be the one to wipe away my tears. Not these tears. Not for this reason. I hate feeling this way every day. I cried out for relief. I finally made myself go out, again. I went out to see friends. It took me several hours. I am cheating everyone I interact with and myself when I feel this way. I feel better now, but what a waste. I can’t stand to live this way. I can picture myself completing this. I have wanted […]
Hi, im Bunny and i like to meet new people, would you guys be my friends? ah, nice to know.
Well, about me? I like to act, to sing, i love going to the gym ! Friends? I dont know… looks like im a popular boy, everyone wants to go bed with me… ops, bed? i meant everyone cares for me. Oh quite the hypocrisy, no one cares to anyone, they just wanna bed you, you’re a mere toll, was I? Oh yeah… rape me please, as you do again and again.
Oh Isaque, your skin seems so pretty, can I touch it? Sure you can milady.
Which moisturizer […]
This 60 second video made me burst out into tears and change my entire perspective on humanity. It’s amazing how pure some people’s hearts are. PLZ WATCH!
Made Me Cry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KNCkuUOwoQ
^ this video is made by a youtuber that I do not support
I have depression. Everyday it’s a big struggle to get up and out of bed. Part of the reason is because it’s near impossible to fall asleep between the tears and the suicide plans I plan but am too tired to act out. I’ve been on antidepressants for 6 weeks but the give me horrible mood swings and have made me feel worse… I’ve stopped taking them until my doctor can prescribe me a new kind, but that’s not until next week… I’m tired all the time… Everyone says that it’s because the stress and anxiety from the depression tires you out… My ex boyfriend, […]
This is one of those nights where I feel like ish won’t go right…. I tried to keep telling myself things could be worse. But in reality … If it got any worse I just wouldn’t be able to make it…. Tonight I just wanna cry… But the tears don’t mean anything… Because no one cares… I don’t even care anymore… #FML
“She’s so lucky, she’s a star
but she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart thinking:
if there’s nothing missing in my life
then why do these tears come at night?”
I’m so sad all the time… all I want to do is cry, it’s gotten so bad that I can’t control the tears anymore..
What’s wrong with me??? I need help.. but how? I tried telling my mom Im depressed.. but I couldn’t.. because she’ll ignore it and tell me to power through my phase.. I guess that’s what they should end off with at my funeral; she powered through
Tonight was the second time in less then a week that I’ve been told depression doesn’t exist and that we all have control of our minds and chose how we want to be… Were just soaking ourselves in tears and sadness because were too “lazy” to get out and try to be happy…………
Let’s see where to start when everything is wrong
My life is a mess and it seems to just get worse
I try to work it out I try to fake a smile
Every time I see the shimmer of light
I get dragged back down into this darkness
Inside my chest is this hole that never seems to heal
Despite my efforts and my attempts it’s the same
Gashed open arms stapled shut
Medication overdose, drowning
Always being found before it’s to late
Dragged to the hospital yet another week
In solitary alone under suicide watch
Every attempt always the same
What’s the point of saving someone
Who doesn’t even want to be here in the first place
Why […]
I’m lying on my bed waiting.
For the suicide and self harm thoughts to stop.
For my tears to stop flowing.
For my pillow to dry up.
The sun is coming up and I’m still awake.
Thinking.
Waiting.
Listening to the birds telling me to sleep.
More waiting.
For the numbness that will greet me soon.
Hopefully.
I just want to be at peace
Even if it means becoming numb and never being able to be happy ever again.
I’m waiting.
I don’t want to feel anymore.
I’m waiting to become numb.
It hurts so much to see what you’re all going through and what you have been through. If I could, I’d take all of your pain on my own shoulders. I’d not survive it but I would rather my own suffering than all of yours. I’m not the crying type of person but this honestly brings tears to my eyes. Especially knowing that I’m useless in helping anyone with their problems. But if anyone wants to share their burden, I’m here.
I am an artist
Though I cannot paint
I cannot write a novel
I cannot act in a film
Yet I am an artist
My paintbrush is my razor
My story is told through my tears
My film is life and my smile is the main character
I am an artist
Whose painting is in cerise beads
Whose story is in each crystal stream
Whose persona hides a reality behind a perfected smile
I am an artist
An artist with a dark truth
A hidden story
And a made up happy ending
I am an artist
An artist that has ran out of space for […]
Well, this depression is destroying my life. I can’t be happy anymore. I used to be so funny and loud, but now all that is just a history. I can’t study, eat, or go out. I’m locked in my room 3/4 of a day.
At night I fell asleep 
with tears in my eyes. I can’t control myself anymore. I feel like I’m death, and now I am just breathing..
I don’t know where to begin. I’m 25. And I’m scared honestly. I know the tears that runs down face, is pain. And I feel like I can’t go through it anymore. This life of mines is something I don’t want to go through anymore. I’ve dealt with so much throughout my life, I feel like, I just can’t do it anymore.
She cried, no, she wept all because of the secret she had kept she cut and she bled..knowing there was so much blood and tears to shed. She had love and she had lust…but this one she felt was a must. She had regrets and memories but this one was one I won’t forget..no not me.her life would be taken..with one simple movement from a knife,calling me out for I have committed a sin.
You know when I was depressed I always had this thought.
I always had this dream, this expectation, this thought.
That a person would come into my life and pick up my broken pieces.
That someone would help me off the ground and get me walking again.
Someone would wipe away my tears and dust me off and hold my hand.
That a human being would sit down with me and just hug me.
That someone would help me calm down and stop me from punching the wall and bruising myself.
Well guess what.
I’m fine now.
I am recovered and still recovering.
No one […]