feeling … not feeling

i am feeling so overwhelmed, that i dont even know what how i feel anymore…is it possible to walk through your own life so numb? not knowing what you’re doin who you’re seeing, talking to, you know you’re hungry but you’re too tired to eat. too tired to sleep. too tired to take a shower, to change… i know i have to work to support my kids, but it’s all too familiar. at least they put a smile on my face…most of the time. i’m such a disappointment – in my parents eyes. failed marriages, three kids, repossessed cars, careless with money. maybe i should be on drugs…but i cant afford them anyway. why does my head hurt soo much!? i’m just tired of it all, i’m soo overwhelmed