i’ve never been so angry… i was the one bringing her down.. until i started to really care. i wanted things to work like she wanted them. i realized that i really love her. and then this fucking bullshit happen.. we fought. we broke up. i was sad that she was gone, but still she was scared of me. then i find out she fucked him.. and itÂ devastatesÂ me.. i’ve never been so messed up in the mind. idk what to think. my heart is gone, my feelings with it. only two stay behind. to make things worse.. anger consumes me. i get so fucking mad i start shaking.. i think of hurting her. finding her and beat life out of her, just to understand my pain.. i think of killing him.. stabbing him, Â over and over these things play in my head. i come close to it.. i come very close to doing the things in my head, the things anger is telling me to do.. i don’t, and it makes me furious. how can i be such a fucking *****.. to not do anything?!?!?! what the fuck is wrong with me?!?! i fucking hate her.. but i love her.. she asks if we could talk… and tells me that she loves me, shes sorry, and wants to get back with me.. it confuses me even more.. what do i do? anger still consumes me.. onlyÂ despairÂ growsÂ stronger as well.. idk what to do..