I live a pretty interesting life… I’m on seriquil right now 100mg. Not taking it right now… not for the last 72 hrs… makes me sleep.
listining to life is beautiful by Sixx AM off the album the Heoin diaries.
I believeÂ that the closer we get to death the closer we feel alive… becuse your never more alive then when your dieing that includes killing yourself.
I believe that we are all running out of time and we are all going to die… so fuck it… and enjoy life… its coming and we can’t stop it.
I do believe that I made a deal with god… that I won’t kill myself… but I no longer care if I die… it has gotten me into a lot of life changing events I’ll tell you that. funny how you can be afraid to die even when you want to kill yourself….
for the past 72 hrs I have been listning to NIN Something I can never have… I found the flyleaf one
it’s really good…
I have heard that a lot of people commit suicide to this song.
I stay on that edge of life… because if I don’t I’ll get complacent and fuck myself up again like right now and Really want to kill myself…. everyone has 1,000 ways to die in there head… planing it out… putting there affairs into order… make a to do list with killing yourself on it just to make sure that the job is done.Â I’m going to die… because I’m dieing. I’m just in the take the safety away from it part right now.
so talk to me I need to tell someone its ok…