wow i’ve read stuff here and i was like… i should have been writting here long ago….
im a 19 yr old guy.. i really dont think ANYONE has it worst than me. first of all. in my childhood i’ve been abused… (lets not go there)
which resulted in me being curious for the other sex.
my family are strictly against gays and lesbians. my parents…. i wish they can divorce already… since i can remember they always fight infront of us…. for 19years i’ve watched them fight… and on top of it i had my own problems that i had no one to talk to about…. my alder brother treats me like shit.. because he suspects that im gay. my dad… the worst… he wont even ask me how i am….
my school i’ve been picked on alot…. till mid high school i became a bit popular because i was everyones friend…
i always faild mathematics…. and my dad is a mathematics teacher. ironic?
my final year at high school i did bad…. faild mathematics as usuall… did not have enough marks to get me in a university…. so i took the year off trying to pass mathematics… but who are we kidding? I FAILD IT!!!
so while i was failing mathematics.. i met a guy… we dated for 8months inlove… obviously my parents did not know… till we broke up on new years eve… im crushed… sad…. heartbroken… but now that we broke up i realised that im messing around. im not gay i was just curious. but its not like i can switch off emotions like that
im good at nothing. i cant get a job for the mean time because i dont know how to do anything. my whole family say think that im a mistake. i cant study this year because dad doesnt have money for me.
so there we go. another year of pain for me. just sitting at home doing nothing. i just wish that i can be dragged to the deepest hole on this earth and just stay there away from everyone. with unlimited supply of food :), oh just btw i am tall and skinny i look very awkward… because i have the biggest head in the world. and if your standing from far you can already see “FAILURE” written on my head. there is so much id like to add here but i just cant get them down in words….