My son proposed to his girlfriend tonight, and she said yes.
The wedding will be sometime next summer. I’m happy for them, they’ve been dating for almost 5 years, since they were 15 and 16.
It’s just kind of strange. That wedding is one of the last links keeping me here.
It’s too soon… I don’t want to die.
But at the same time… its not soon enough, I don’t want to live.
I can feel the links breaking, one at a time.
My dad was my hero …8/29/08
My mom, I’m glad she’s gone…7/19/09
My dog was like my baby … 8/9/10
It’s just a matter of time before the rest of the links are broken and I am out of time.
Yeah, I know. All of this is pretty pathetic… what can I say?
So am I.
15 comments
i’m glad to hear your son is getting married, that’s so cute ^^ i heard weddings are such happy occasions.
if the wedding is one of your last links…maybe make another? if your son and his gf have a kid one day, won’t you want to see it? 🙂 try to make future links to replace past ones
@Maeliin….My son is finishing up college, he’s in public relations but is going for his Master’s.
His fiancee’ has two more years to go and is going into social work.
So I think it’s going to be a long time before they have kids.
Too long to wait.
Besides the wedding I have one more major link that I’m trying to hold out for until that one breaks.
Once it does I won’t be able to hang on, or even want to.
There will be nothing that I’ll be able to stay here for.
@Maeliin… thanks though.
): it’ll be a long time to wait, but won’t it be worth it? i mean… kids are born every second, but this will be your son’s kid..don’t you want to be there to say congrats?
I’ve been fighting depression for almost 30 years.
I had hoped to go back to school and do something with my life
but I have come to the realization that I can’t concentrate, I can’t quit work to “concentrate” on school full time and at this point even if I could I don’t think I have the ability. High school honors and AP classes were a lifetime ago.
Once that last link is gone so am I.
I love my son.
It’s just that I can’t hold on much longer.
): i’m sorry to hear that depression has hurt you for so long… if it was a physical object i would light it on fire and watch as it was consumed, rather than watch us all consumed by it…
Thanks, that sounds like a good idea.
I’m just SO tired
I just want out now, yet I still have those 2 links left.
To leave before they’re broken… I don’t think is a choice.
Once that second one is no longer part of my life I don’t stand a chance.
): is there any chance we can become new links?
That sounds good 🙂
And I’m not sure how to say this… that other link?
It’s the only thing keeping me going from day to day.
Without it? I can’t even THINK about breathing.
Already crying just thinking about when that day comes!
if i may ask, what is the other link?
and…if we do somehow become new links, i guarentee for at least me you’ll become a link as well… lol…
It’s a really good friend, my only real friend… he knows EVERYTHING about me and it doesn’t make any difference to him, he’s still my friend.
Thanks. 🙂
It’s just I really can’t imagine my life without this person as a part of it.
Oh, God! Freaking out here!
I’m just trying to enjoy the time we have left because if I think about when it comes to an end all I’m going to do is cry or just sit there and stare at nothing.
don’t think of the end then, journey, think of the good times you’ll keep having with your friend 🙂 s/he surely is thinking of all the wonderful adventures you two will share 🙂
I hope so, but I worry that I’m too much of a nuisance (sp???)
That he’s just gotten frustrated with me and really doesn’t want to see me.
That he really dreads seeing me but doesn’t know how to tell me.
That inside he’s saying “Oh, s***.” when he sees a text from me.
Face it… I’m not the most interesting person to have around right now… too depressed.
You’re not pathetic or a nuisance or any of that. I’m sure he won’t get frustrated to see you. Like Maeliin said, you can make new links. If not, just get happier and live happily. We’re here to help if you ever want it.