When he thinks back to before his depression, it really does go all hazy. Was he ever happy? Was it just a dream? It really does seem that way. He litterally cannot remember how to feel happiness anymore. He can’t get that smile that says “I’m happy without a care in the world” anymore, He’s lost it.
When he thinks back to happy memories, it actually gives him a headache. Just because he cannot remember how to feel that joy, that happiness. How is he supposed to get back to something he doesn’t know how to feel anymore?
Did all of those things really happen to him? Was he in love with the perfect girl? Was he perfectly balanced with all of his reponsibilities? Was he happily mixing with a crowd that really cared about him? Did he really have a time where he could turn around and say ‘I love my life’. Where he could wake up in the morning and know exactly what was coming and feel more than enough inside to face the day?
They just seem unreal now. A past life, a different person.
So many questions, so little answers.
Sorry, I write a lot of short stories like this in 3rd person but this is how I feel..
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The time will come, don’t give up. Other ways, contact me.