Bad Bad Day

Today was awful.  My parents were fighting all day, then I got so sick of it I left.  I was walking when i saw my friend at a movie in the park.  I went and talked to him for a while then he said this friend of ours (a girl, one of his exs) wanted to come, so we went to get her and she gave me a hug because she hadnt seen me in a while.  We went and watched the movie and it was fun, but afterward we went walking and they started playing around, smacking each others butts, (Theyre still really good friends and she just broke up with her boyfriend), and I just got really sad and left after a while.  I never felt like a third wheel before until tonight.  I cried while I walked home alone.  I wish I had someone to do that with, that liked me and would play around physically.  One thing that really bothers me is that she likes him so much, but doesnt even know he cheated on her.  Fuck it, I guess I dont deserve it.  Im ugly, Im overweight, and I guess Im just all around too pathetic to get one.  When I was walking home I kept imagining there were ropes hanging from peoples trees, because if there were at that moment, I wouldve probably had enough guts to just kill myself there.