There are times when I lose hope. When everything seems to be falling apart and I’m getting hit left and right. There are times when I want to give up and let the darkness swallow me. But then I think…what good will it do? I’ve been to that dark place…the place where god no longer exsists and not even your family and friends can save you. In that place you search and search for that one thing that will save you. Yourself. But it’s hard…it’s hard to figure out something that could be so easy to know. Yet it’s gone. And you struggle and struggle until you feel like you’re about to burst. And you give up. You give up on something that is so important…so beautiful…
 I don’t remember the day I began to fade away. The day I decided everything was to hard to try anymore. The day I started to lose myself. I remember how easy it was yet it hurt. But the pain seemed to be fine with me as long as I pleased everyone else. I can still hear the voices in my head when I lost myself. Each voice was me…each voice said the same things. “Stop.” That’s all it said. I knew it was wrong to lose myself but I had to. At least…that’s what I thought at the time.
The fight was long and hard. The fight against me and the other me; the opposite me. Along the way I’d fought against every monster inside of me until I reached the main event. The person I had to fight in order to win. Myself. Though it wasn’t the real me. It was just my reflection; the person I was pretending to be. It was hard to fight against myself, to beat myself. But I did it. And I won.
There will be times when I lose hope in everything. My life isn’t perfect. But I can’t let one thing let me down. No…I won’t go to that dark place again. There will be times when I’m lost and confused. When I really am alone. But it’ll blow over as long as I let it. I’ve found myself and finally ended the cold, long, vicious war that was building and building inside of me. Today I’ve lived. And I’m happy for what seems like the first time.