Well. Life just keeps getting shittier and shittier. I thought I was ok. I thought I can do this! Im stronger then this! Then I fall. And i fall hard. I thought I was ok so I went to a party. Had a good tine then my world fucking crashed. I just balled my eyes out downstairs. I truly wanted to die. Again. It will happen one day. Im goinig to crack and just do it. One day im going to be gone. The world will go on without me. Years from now my name will be forgottwn. None of this matters.
I guess not even my love for my bestfriend matters. Yeah thats right I am in love with my nest friend. I want her to be mine.. But I cant have her.
I guess im not comfortably numb. Im just numb..? -.-
8 comments
Why would you deprive your best friend of your company? That doesn’t seem too fair. What happened to make you fall, if I may ask? If you’d like to talk in private, my email is always open: merelyatropos@gmail . com
Why can’t you have her? And maybe it’s better that way if you think about it because when it comes down to it having a best friend is going to matter more in the long run and you don’t want to lose her to relationship drama.
@emptiness7 The one thing in life I would not fuck up if i had it is her. Shes wonderful. Weve never dated but were always been florty. Shes always there for me and im always tgere for her. If i had something so wonderful as her in my life id do everything to have her forever. We wouldnt just be a couple. We would be bestfriends also.
Sometimes getting into a relationship with someone that close to you isn’t such a good idea. You can be really good friend and flirt but be open to dating other people. What else in life has you down, hon?
What else has me dow in life?
Well latley its been my family. My dad, hes an angry drunk depressed fuck who lives 15 mi.utes away. Who i have not seen in about a year. I feel like im going to end up like him. Im afraid of my thoughts.
Maybe you are right about the relationship not being a good idea but everytime I think of it it feels so right. And when im around her it feels right. Hmm. Idk what else to say. Ive got too much on my mind.
So what’s stopping you? 🙁
Well shes got a boyfriend. (not a nce one either. It really sucks when your friends man dont lime you) anyway. Idk whats stopping me. Fear. :3 im afraid to let my feelings out. Id probably get rejected anyway. She could do so much better then lil old me.
hey,
emptiness is right about the relationship. Don’t risk your friendship. A good friendship is better then a relationship in the most cases. Really trust me, because I was in the same situation, I had a very good friend and I showed her my feelings –> now I am all alone again, I destroyed my only one friendship I had. Now I am really lonely and I had a horrible time the last weeks.
Think about the things which keep you really down, try to do something about them. Try to come along with your family
You are really lucky to have such a good friendship. Don’t risk it!!!!
If you want to know want can happen if you try to get a relationship read my story http://thinking-about-my-life.blogspot.de/
I hope I could give you good advice