i really dont get some the reasons for open caskets,before the funerals, they say its respectful to look at who ever is dead laying in there coffin, as everyone is standing in aline waiting to look.so im saposibly the disrespectful one that doesnt look, but tell me,if i really loved that person, why would i want the last image in my head to be of them laying in a coffin dead?if i only had one very last memory, why would i want it to be of them dead? why? that horrible?when my step dad died and i got close enough up to the open casket to see the very tip of his face, thats the last memory i have of him, if thats paying your respects to be stuck witht that image for the rest of your life,then i will take the chance if being disrespectful,cause my grandpa isnt doing good, and whn that time comes,i can be dispized for that, but i aint gonna have my last image of him bein dead, im sick of people telling me thats respectful to look at a dead body, no, thats just tramatizing to get that as your last image of someone you loved,m last image is gonna be of him smileing and happy, and i dont care what anyone has to say about that,
Grieving is complex, takes time and energy.
You must grieve In Your own way.
Only you can follow your path to healing when faced with such a loss.
Well I do understand what you’re saying, but I know when my mom died I remember that entire last year of her life (fighting cancer). I watched her take her last breath and watched her die. That is the image I’m left with. When the funeral came, I saw her and it wasn’t her…it was weird…but she wasn’t there. It was just a body. It didn’t look like her anyway, she lost a lot of weight and she had no hair. Not at all what she looked like all her life. I didn’t expect to feel like that, to feel like she went on and that wasn’t her. My sister died on impact in a head on collision later the same year. That was different because it was unexpected. I wanted to see her (at the funeral) because I knew that would be the absolute last time I would ever see her. It was different at her funeral. I didn’t feel the same as I did at my mom’s. Idk you know, it’s up to you on how you feel about funerals. It is a very difficult time and if you want to stay in the back of the room and grieve how you want to, do it. If you feel like you don’t want to remember your loved one like that, don’t go up to the casket and look. It’s understandable…and it’s going to be your memories no one else’s…