I don’t know how to begin this post so I will just start somewhere. I am a hated human being by everyone. Including my family who always talk about me behind my back saying how horrible of a person I am. I’ve heard them. Â I have social issues because I am homeschooled and when I took a class at a local school people thought I was too weird and never talked to me because I never talked and I didn’t like the things they liked. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. And of course they talked about how weird I was when I wasn’t around. Even if they did get to know me they would hate me anyways because I’m such a rotten person with anger issues. Â So I just sit in my room playing my computer and drawing all day listen to the only comfort I got which is music. Music for me fills up the place in my heart where human beings are supposed to be. That is just the way it is. I have been suicidal in the past, But things got a little better. Then they get bad again. This pattern has been going on for the past few years. I wouldn’t say I am suicidal at the moment but may be getting there. The worst thing is I have nobody to tell this to as everybody hates me. I do not want pity though I want actual help. And when I try to get that from my family they will save what I said and use it against me in the future. So I stopped asking for help. Â So just move along, There’s nothing left to see. Just a body. Nothing left to see.
7 comments
I’m assuming that your young because you mentioned home schooling. You are probably not as bad as you might think. Most of the adults I’ve come across are real jerks. I mean on a completely different level. Hey, people will always talk. They talk about others because their own lives are so insignificant. It’s a shame that your family are saying these things but you will just have to concentrate on your future. With or without them. I’m drunk most of the time so I don’t really analyse the things people say about me. The say far worse things for sure.
Teenagers today are cruel and they don’t think about how what they say and do effects others. There is a world out there beyond your bedroom walls that is just waiting for you to come a explore. Trust me, in the world there are so many people that you can connect with because they are like you, you’re not alone in anyway. It’s hard now because you feel trapped and you feel helpless but you’re not. You have to keep on pushing for better and don’t you ever settle for less. Your life is to valuable and you should realize that. Those who have it the hardest 9 times out of 10 are the most successful. Why? Because they work harder than everyone else to make sure that they live the perfect life and make up for all the years that they felt they weren’t good enough. If you just hold on a little bit longer you will see that there is more to live that you didn’t even know about. You can do it and you don’t have to go at it alone. Don’t worry, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck 🙂
Hi there,
If you don’t mind me asking, when you say u have social issues, which is why u r home schooled, what do you mean? Have you been officially diagnosed with something? Just asking because it seems that would be where to start to find help?
I can’t stand how teenagers mock people that are ‘different’. You want to know something funny? How we all try fit in and be the same as everyone else in our teens but once out of school, that changes. Then we all want to be individuals and be different and unique!
Thinking back to my school days where the people who used to do the bullying and mocking were actually the most insecure ones. They were the ones with issues trying to hide behind this big act.
If you give us more information, maybe we can give you better advice?
Move along people, nothing to see here.
How can you say your a hated human being. I don’t hate you.
I have social issues because I have been homeschooled my whole life and when I would go out in public I would be very shy and would try very hard not to get put in a situation where I would have to talk to someone. I would always have my sister pay for something at the cash register if we went to a store while I would hide in an aisle and once she finished I would get out of the store as quick as possible (No running obviously though). I haven’t been diagnosed with a certain something but that is only because I am too shy to go see a psychiatrist. I know this is abnormal. I go to great lengths just to avoid talking to people.
I understand. Makes a bit more sense.
So if I put this in different words, is it correct to say maybe you are afraid of socializing because you don’t have lots of experience with it ?
Fear can be an incredibly powerful thing.
If you had the power to change things, what would you want instead?
I read this ..then have to say ‘time out’… lets take a step back,..you are surrounded by people who are mean to you.. and you have always been home schooled..of course you are afraid of people you do not know.. you are normal… you are not ill or odd or damaged goods… the way you feel is normal. BUT you do have to get your courgage up and make yourself start to reach out.. to real people.. if you are not ready for all day real school, you could do a class or two at public school, or a local group – join a group that shares your interest. You will be afraid.. you are an infant who needs to crawl.. and one day you will walk. Get started with baby steps… you can do it !