Damned To Hell…..

I have a shameful story today. Well I liked my best friend’s brother for a while now, I did tell her, and we never told him. So one day me, her, and her mother were supposed to go to a fashion show because her mother is a model and the girls needed help getting dressed and undressed. I came in a dress, that’s what I thought we had to wear, but her mother wasn’t there so we had to wait til she got home. Me and my friend along with her brother were in their parents room listening to music, then he asked if I could rap I said yes then he asked if I could freestyle I said no so he offered to teach me. My friend left the room because she got bored leaving me in the room with him alone. So we kept free styling all is good then he asked if I could write a remix to a song called My Homie’s Still by Lil Wayne and I said sure why not. As I’m writing he grabs my head and brings it closer to his as if he was going to kiss me, he does this 2 times then whispers in my ear if I kiss you it’s only between us then kisses me. In my head I’m freaking out really bad. He comes back in the room and starts kissing me more sort of getting on top of me but I push him off, he does this about 5 times. My friend walked in on us kissing and pulls me outside and asks me if we were kissing, knowing she would freak out, I said no don’t be crazy. I went back into the room and I told him she asked and I said no, he said good and started kissing me again but still I pushed him off and told him we can’t do this, but still he kept kissing me. Then he left the room again, he came back and told me his mother and father were coming in so I had to leave the room, so when I got up to leave he grabbed me and kissed me repeatedly and felt up under my dress to my butt. I pushed off and walked out the room.Her mother talked to us about what was supposed to happen today but didn’t happen and how we’re going to go next week and what we have to do. So it’s about 11:34pm and I had to get home, her father told him to take me home. In my head I’m thinking shit I can’t even handle him in a room with the lights on how am I going to handle him on the streets in the dark. So we walk out the door and he asks me if what just happened weird to me I said yes, then we come towards some apartment complexes next to mine. He walked off the sidewalk into the grass in the dark and told me come here, me being a dumb ass, I went and he grabbed and held me by my waist and kissed me repeatedly then pushed me up against a wall. I feel really bad on how I just couldn’t resist on how he was making me feel so I just couldn’t push him off me like I was doing in the house. So we’re making out like sluts in the dark. The only thing that got me out of Pleasure Ville was when he quickly put his hand up my dress into my underwear and touched my vagina. Instantly i moved his hand and backed away from him. He asked if he went too far, i automatically said yes you caught me off guard I don’t like people touching me (because of my uncle I don’t even want to have sex) down there, he said oh okay I’m sorry well do you want to leave or stay here for a little bit longer, my first instinct after that was it’s going to happen again and it may get even more intense so I said I wanted to go home. We walked to my house and stopped in front of my door, even though he scared me I always give him a hug when we part, gave a quick hug and once again he kissed me twice and left. He labeled us as ‘Friends With Benefits’. I told my friend, of course, and she got mad at the both of us but mostly him because he tried to keep it a secret and touched me inappropriately, she said she wouldn’t tell him I told her. I was told yesterday by he that they got in an argument and told him and that he said he doesn’t care about me. I have to be honest I was hurt. Now I wear a purity ring and have no boyfriend, no flirting, no anything, but every time we see each other we don’t give eye contact or smile or even talk to each other and now all I want to do is apologize…… To Be Continued With Another Story