Sometimes I wish I could be in a car accident, not for the attention. So if I woke up I could see who actually cares, who sat there and thought even for a second “damn I hope she survives.” and if I didn’t wake up, I wouldnt have to worry about them knowing it was suicide. 
  Sometimes I wish that I was normal. You know, actually wantedd? With friends that didn’t ditch me, backstabbing me or using me. I dont want to be stuck inside 24/7, the only times i go out is when i ask, or they want something, not the People who only speak to me because they saw something they could buse me for. I want the old times back, the innocence and fake safety. It’s better than being left stranded alone.