On Facebook, my cousin has been sending me messages that upset me even more about my past. Plus because my depressions just getting worse and worse this is what she thinks:
*****, your going crazy and your always depressed. why dont you just stop feeling sorry for yourself and GET A REAL LIFE!! Besides noone said that life was fair. Other people get raped and beat up. Do you see them crying about it or making a big deal about it?? Your ALONE N**** noone cares!!!! Oh except your self. Its a wonder why youve lost friends for this. It gets old and annoying! Everyone gets depressed. Like i fee depressed a lot like when Tyler broke up with me. I have a bad memory of that and i dont make a big deal out of it. Your only hiding your cuts because there just scratches. Your doing it for attention. If your going to act this way then there is absolutely no hope! What so ever! And its your fault…YOURS!! You got yourself into this mess and you can dig your self out! I was depressed all day thurs. Chris wouldnt answer me back after i spilled my whole heart out to him. The way your acting…YOUR JUST PUNISHING US! Get over it, get a new life. Then you can talk to all of us. So dont bother wasting your time talking to anyone because they dont care either! Bye! – *******
I dont feel sorry for myself not one bit. thats why i keep to myself about it. shes been reading my messages on my account until i found out and changed my password. thats how she knows. im not making a big deal about it either. honestly i dont even give a crap what happenes to me id love to help others but im too weak to even live on myself. my cuts are wayyyyy worse then scratches shes NEVER seen them as cuts only scars and thats after scar cream too. i know no one cares, i dont care if they do. i dont feel loved anymore by anyone! i know im punishing them. i dont deserve to be here they dont deserve to have me throwing there life away. my parents pay for my dr visits for meds nd counseling appts alll of my meds. im just a burden. the one GIANT!! habit i have and what needs to stop….is BREATHING!! ive written 3 songs and a poem nd some quotes today already. ive been TRYING and trying to do english, math and business homeworks today. i have tomorrow for eng. then til wed for math nd business. spring breaks over soon starts up again monday. i mean im loooking forward to it just not handing in the work. college means a lot to me i have 1 awesome professor who can make you laugh no matter what but i just cant laugh now nothing can make laugh. but thanks Professor (Dr.) ******.
9 comments
You can tell your cousin I said: “Why don’t you stop being so critical? You are a waste of space and it’s people like you that make people commit suicide. Why don’t you deal with your own obvious issues instead of being horrible to someone who at least has the self-awareness and honesty to face theirs. YOU IGNORANT BAG OF EXCREMENT. Ahem.”
id love to but no one knows how i feel. shed sure tell if i threw sumthing back at her. i wud tho nd thnk you.
Yeah (wat she sed ^) then block your cousin because dat’s how we do.
cant block her my moms on both our friends lists, shed be questioning y? …..its hard…im just lost.
You say no one understands you, but look at the website you posted this in. Look at everyone around you. We all suffer, from different things, but we still suffer. She’s not important in YOUR life. SHE’S the one who no one cares about. SHE’S the one who wants attention. One person can bring you down, but someone else will bring you right back up to the top. You’re a brave person, I’m happy your still fighting it. I’m happy you’re still walking on the earth.
thx but i sure aint. every small thing makes it worse
I’m new here and was hoping that I could help someone through my experiences. If i may offer my humble opinion…drop her. Honey, you do not need people in your life that will set you up for failure and, often it is the people that don’t understand that set us up for failure. I was faced with deleting my cousin off facebook because she often posted thing that would send me into a spiraling rage, it was unhealthy, she had to go for MY well being. Me, my husband, my child were more important than maintaining a kinship that caused nothing, but grief. The people that matter, the people that care, they know the truth and they love you. Ask those people for help, allow them to lift you up and support you. NEVER, NEVER, NEVER be afraid to ask for what you need. It nearly cost me my life before I could recognize the ones around me that would help and would support me. Please don’t give this twit power over you! You can control this…YES, you can! You will never be able to control the things that people say about you or do to you, but you can control how you react.
” i dont feel loved anymore by anyone! i know im punishing them. i dont deserve to be here they dont deserve to have me throwing there life away. my parents (my husband) pay for my dr visits for meds nd counseling appts alll of my meds. im just a burden”….have you been reading my journal? I tried to kill myself this past November, a little over a year after my big brother was killed in a motorcycle accident, but praise God I was unsuccessful. Now I am in intense therapy and my new pdoc is trying new medication cocktails. I’m also diagnosed bipolar II, social phobic, OCD and ADD. I’m hopeful and that is enough to get me through one day at a time, to take the next fistful of pills, to go to the next therapy appointment. Keep that little bit of hope alive inside of you. I thought death was what I wanted, I’m glad that I am alive to find that I was wrong.
Yeah, last oct i also tried killing myself. i lost my daughter (miscarrige) and my boyfriend 2 weeks apart from each other. when i was 16. i know i was 2 young but things do happen nd i dont believe in abortions. i also have bipolar depression. doesnt help does it? and thank you!
I hope you can cut your cousin out of your life. She’s obviously a shitty person just be really grateful you aren’t a bad person like her. Being raped ruins your life. Ruins it. Forever.