Ever get lost in the lie of pretending you’re ok?
like living in a dream then waking up?
or committing to something to just to break that commitment a day later?
it sucks
makes me wonder what can i do
living behind a mask being ok when your not, so is it to be ok when you’re not ok but you believe you are?
i dunno
4 comments
hi Craf,
i lived like that, lying… i had to plan my suicide and in the meantime lies were pilling up making me go crazy. I lied to people around me, i lied to my therapist, i lied to my family, i pushed people away, family away, everyone away… it was becoming too much! It doesnt work for long.
I don’t know why anyone should become depressed about pretending to be ok.
We all wear masks and spend at least part of our day pretending, and I wonder if we accepted that as a given and refused to be depressed about it if we might create a space where the pretence becomes real.
To become depressed about pretending not to be depressed… a infinite loop that ends with us tied up in knots where you can only end in getting lost.
This type of circular being is allowing you to avoid the real issues. If you want out you are going to have to stop beating yourself up about pretending to be ok.
If you are able to pretend to be ok you ought to be able to deduce what it is that would make you be ok. Start their, baby steps.
I’ve been stucked in acting ok when I was not or acting better than I feel. I’m so used to that mask that it’s almost a part of me, I even don’t know when I wear it or not… It really sucks. I hope at least you can be honest to yourself… That’s an important thing… Good luck!! <3
Everyone wears a mask in some degree.