I hate myself. Its hard not to hate yourself when everyone else hates you. Hell, Im so ugly and unlikeable that people wont even SIT beside me! Desk change today. My desk was moved so I was beside this one boy Reid, and on the other side of him was Farhan. Before class even started, Reid requested to be moved halfway across the room. But of course, my desk was moved again to be beside Farhan’s desk. What does he do? He moves his chair to be as far from me as possible. Then, he moves his things to the next desk. While I walked to my locker before class, I overheard two guys saying something. “Reid’s in between Jessica and Farhan! Man, I feel bad for him!” God, I feel horrible.
I lost my best friend the other day. She wont talk to me. I feel so alone, I tried to hang out with other people, but I feel like a third wheel. Ive been heavy hearted all week, I cant sleep because I keep thinking about how I lost my friend, how I’ll never belong anywhere. It doesnt help me any that I see mirrors everywhere. I swear Im going to break every mirror in this fucking house. I keep thinking about how perfect it’d be to slit my throat with the mirror’s glass.
But hey, I dont know why I feel so bad. After 13 years, I should be used to it.
3 comments
Twenty years ago Rush Limbaugh began to deride a 13 year old girl on his popular AM radio show. These days she lives in Manhattan with her husband and reports news stories from all over the world. She totally gorgeous now and Rush Limbaugh still looks like a toad. Her name is Chelsea Clinton.
Hey, you know whats sad? That when someone gets hurt and say their used to it or should be. That just means that they have gone through too much pain. Those bastards dont know what they are talking about! I bet you are a fantastic person to be with! Dont let them get you down. That will give them the satisfaction thinking they won. They should just go to hell.
Do not, and i repeat, do not slit your throat. Please? Remember that after every storm theres a rainbow, you just have to look for it, ok? Your rainbow is still hidden, so look harder for it, ok?
If you need to talk, i will be more than happy to. I would be honored, too. For now, smile. Because it annoys the haters 😉
🙁 I hope you feel better. You’ve gotta know you’re important somehow! I’m sorry you lost your friend :/, you’ll make another though. If you overhear people saying stuff like that it’s understandable to feel bad. Try to ignore them, or accidentally spill something on them, or be nice to that guy so that maybe he’ll realize he’s acting like an asshole and possibly even defend you a little if they ever say anything. You never know :)! Also if you need anyone to talk with because you lost your friend you can email me at freezinginfire @ gmail .com :). If you want to, please just mention who you are.