Suicide

so yesterday I tried to kill myself… it first started off with my having an emotional rage; I was yelling, cussing, crying, and screaming. Then did I go in my room and started cutting myself repeativley… in patterns. When I was about to go deep to where I can cut a tendon my sister walks in the room and sees my with blood everywhere, she tries to get the knife from me, but we just fought over it… later that night me and my boyfriend broke up because he was still talking to his ex… something inside of me just died and I was in complete tears… I knew I didn’t want to live anymore so I took a bunch of pain killers… I started to feel a little sick and I was feeling regret, so I tried my best to throw them up and I did… just the thought and feeling right now that I could’ve been dead is just aching in my heart.