I know this probably isn’t the best site to ask questions, but yahoo answers never works on my kindle. But anyways I’m on summer vacation right now and I’m a 16 year old teenage guy going into my junior year of high school. And I’m having a hard time deciding if I want to keep going to the same school that I’ve been going to right now or if I should switch. And I think I want to switch because I think I want a friend(I don’t have any). I don’t have any friends at my current school because I was a shy,and unconfident of being myself freshman year. I haven’t always been like this but I realized that I only act this way because of my past. I let people tell me that I’m no good, and I believed them. I let them bully me verbally. It’s been 7 years now that I’ve been being bullied this way. I used to be just like most of the other people at school, I used to be really talkative. But I always feel like people are going to attack me verbally, so I isolate myself from everyone else. And now everyone sees me as a anti-social person as they might say. And they always tell others that I don’t talk. Sorry for my language but why the fuck do they have to go tell other people that I don’t talk just because I didn’t talk to them. I clearly didn’t talk to that person because I didn’t like talking to that certain person. Sometimes people try to talk to me and someone always has to be there to say “he doesn’t talk”. I’m not a mute and they know that. But I mean I only stopped being me because of bullies,it’s not that I was always quiet. I’ve been the silent kid in class for 5 and a half years now. I don’t know if this is me but I’m starting to feel like I’ve been trained unwillingly to be this way. But I still want a friend. All I want is one friend,maybe 2-3 but I can’t live alone completely. I mean maybe I can but I just need someone besides my family because everyone in my family is always busy with other things. So my question is: should I switch schools to try and find at least one really good friend? Or should I stay at the same school and end up with no friends due to the fact that everyone thinks I’m anti-social? Apparently once they label you as a he doesn’t talk type guy you’ll always be a he doesn’t talk type guy. Â I know I’m not much of a really talkative guy anymore but I still need interaction with other people (it’s unhealthy for me both mentally and physically believe it or not.)I’m not talkative and crazy like other people who are joking and laughing all the time. I mean I can laugh too but not to their extent. I’ve been through things that have hurt me too bad to hide my pain with stupid jokes about stupid things. I can’t act like nothing’s happened to me. Because something has.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
4 comments
Hey, I think you should first get some help from a therapist who might be able to give you some tips and/or medication to get you to be a little more social. I used to be somewhat of a loner in high school, and what helped me was joining clubs. I was really good at a sport, and I think that really helped me with gaining a little respect. But even now that I am a Junior in college, I have some regrets. Mostly, I wish I joined more clubs, such as the science team, or math team. However, one of my biggest regrets was not addressing my social anxiety (call it social anxiety, but I also found it synonymous with not being able to socialize properly). I wish it was something that I dealt with early on in high school, because now I have to deal with it later in life. Not saying your shyness goes away (or in your case, not talking because of your past), but it’s better to deal with whatever “problem” you have early on.
Sorry to get past the point. But I don’t think switching schools is the important part. If your just as “anti-social” in your old school, you probably won’t make friends in your new school. Also, I think you should look at the bigger picture, because you only have two more year of high school, but the rest of your life is what’s really important.
Thanks for the advice dman5505. I’m doing better these days. I was lost back then. I now understand why i was the way i was back then when i posted this. I couldn’t even understand myself back in high school. I was truly lost in life. Turns out i had forgotten who i was there for a minute due to being in an unsafe environment. My dad was and still is an abusive parent, both mentally and physically. I didn’t realize this then because i thought things at home were normal. After all, abuse is all i had known for most of my adolescence so i had no idea things could be different. Being raised in what felt like a minefield taught me how to be super self conscious and thus i couldn’t trust anyone. If i couldn’t even trust my own dad then who could i trust at the time? I now know that i could’ve made friends very easily in high school if i had learned how to open up and be “vulnerable”. There’s nothing wrong with the real me. In fact the real me is super friendly and approachable as i can see nowadays. But my dad made me feel like it was bad to be me. Being any different from my father made him feel insecure about himself because the real me isnt angry and negative about life like he is. If i grew up to be just like him then his mind would’ve created the excuse that he didn’t need to change. The truth is….he needs to change. He needs help but I’m not gonna destroy my own life just so he can feel safe about who he is right now. He needs to know that he’s him and im me. I’m right and he knows this. He’s just afraid of healing, I wasn’t.
i agree with most of the things dman has said…. hey dont let anyone bully you…find the strength to come out and express yourself even if it is not what anyone else expects of you… make sure people at home gets to spend time with you…what if you cant laugh so much… hey man just be urself and be confident okay.. dont miss out on the good things in life coz of some stupid bullies…
Thanks for the tips guys, I really appreciate it. you’re both helpful.