I understand you the most because i had and still have that kind of thinking. It was a couple of years ago that i was fond of philosophy and really looked for the meaning of life into it. I was sure i would have studied that at the university, because studying every other thing had no sense, i had to find the meaning. But all those philosophers (who i still admire, because in some part we shared an uneasiness, even though different) never turned out to give me that answer. It remained a vague awareness (particularly by the existential ones, Pascal Kierkegaard Nietzsche Sartre) of the futility of so many efforts and research, since everyone of them Always (and i’m putting the capital letter) turned to a banal, expected faith in something (god the first two, yourself the third, the others the last, if i’m recalling right). And here i am, asking if this ancestral question is not, in the end, just an awful way of hiding other concerns or a physical lack. If you have some philosopher you want to advice me, i’d be glad. More, you don’t sound english to me and neither am i. are you from somewhere?

#Hella that’s a good point. You are the girl who’s moving out, aren’t you? So the limits and the restraints put by society (like for example living a normal extraboring life in your hometown all your life long) don’t help at all

Yes that’s basically it..