How is a suicide act selfish?
I’m not happy, I’m tired of being angry at myself and the world. Is hard to get out of bed and putting a smile on and coming home to be miserable. I care for people and put my life on the line for them. If I want to go, I shouldn’t feel guilty right? I think people are being selfish for not letting us do something we want. Why can’t we be happy without being  judge for the choices we make!?
29 comments
I completely agree! But here is the beautiful thing: if you kill yourself, you won’t be around to care abpit public opinion. Im going to leave pages detailing my torment and my care for my loved ones. I cannot control how they react, but hopefully they will understand eventually.
See that’s what I was thinking too, I won’t be able to care anymore. The thing is I can’t leave until I know everyone is stable and until I paid off all my debts because I don’t want them to deal with any more debts. When we go, do you think we will be able to see them react? Like as a sprit.
Empty! What a question! This is a topic I could talk about for hours, but one that is best in a back and forth discussion. The problem is I have two hypotheses. And in my research, both have merits, so I keep them both, while slightly playing favorites with one. But a very simplistic answer is no, I dobt believe so. BUT if we DO have a spirit form that can “see”…then going with my slightly less favorite brain child, we wont perceive it in the same way.
I know! Is something that I been thinking about because I feel like my day is coming soon! The thing is, I want to do it on my birthday but, I don’t know how the funeral arrangements is going to be like. Because my sister’s birthday is close to mine and I don’t want her to be sad on her birthday. You know what I mean? That’s why I have a lot of things to think about. If we do become spirits, we won’t be able to watch over our love ones huh?
Eh…..lets just say it won’t be our spirits in bathrooms sitting on space couches watching them through a 1950s TV that is inside its own stand and has turny knobs. 🙂 Or any variation. Fortunear (pdst not my real name ;-)) wont exist in the same way. A lot if not all my identity is to be left behind. NUT isnt that what we are all going for anyway? Dont want to kill yourself and pop up as a ghost who is just as miserable.
Bathrooms=bathrobes. Stupid phone¡
lol, obviously we’re not in a movie. what is pdst? yeah, I don’t want to be a miserable ghost!
That was supposed to be pssst. Lol Ok. So favorite ghost movie? I could handle being a casper type deal I think.
It is not selfish to die because our life is ours and it’s people’s fault if they depend on us which isn’t even true: give them some time and they’ll be okay, they’ll move on because nobody actually needs anybody.
Then, if you really want to die, you’d have killed yourself already but if you’re still alive which means that you want things to change but are too overwhelmed or afraid to act (people are not there to help you and if they are, they will be happy with themselves if they do… which means they partially do it for themselves, to feel powerful and good) so you can say you procrastinate or you are too afraid of the pain, but what you’re actually afraid of isn’t even life… It’s the feeling of having so many things to do to get back on track that you don’t know even where or how to start. Thus you convince yourself that you don’t really want or care about anything so that you can easily carry the burden of your fake nonchalance (not saying that it’s easy this way, but it is indeed easier to say that you don’t care while actually you do, but again feel buried under the numerous things you have to do to have the life you want or the one you used to have).
So my point is: you want to live, but don’t want to act – which could be understandable if you’re depressed and in that case, to move on, you have to start from healing your scars and traumas that caused the depression. Though first of all, you have to acknowledge that you have a problem.
lol, of course is not your real name! Mines isn’t empty22 either. Yeah I think Casper is a cool ghost to be. hmmm kind of think of it, That’s the only friendly ghost!
Well, I would be ok being one of the obnoxious brothers too! And Patrick Swayze ghost seemed a little “friendly” if you know what I mean lol.
lol, I would be an annoying sister! and no I don’t know what you mean, what movie is that?
The movie Ghost! With the famous clay pot scene?!
ohhhhhh yeahhhhhh!I don’t know names of actors! Now I know what your talking about!
Im one of those movie nerds! I could easily just keep going listing ghost movies…but I wont. Ill spare you. 🙂
lol, I know movies but, not on the top of my head!
Its not selfish its other people who are selfish and dont care to understand how we feel but that being said i said we which means theres a lot of us so hang in here i need people like u around to know theres people understandin how i feel and everything im here if you wanna talk mkafan12@yahoo.com
People who say it’s selfish refuse to acknowledge that mental anguish can be as torturous as it is. As outrageous said above, many people want to “help” and pat themselves on the back that they helped “save someone’s life.” (Believe me, I’ve been on the receiving end of this with someone literally sending out an e-mail to some mutual acquaintances about how she saved my life.) To say we are being selfish is to deny what we have been through, what we are going through, and the right to end an invisible suffering.
It is selfish, simply because the entire justification for your suicide is about what: how YOU feel. And you want to eliminate how THEY would feel from the equation. So, it is all about you and that, as it happens, is the definition of selfish.
However (and you will see this as “Unfornatelyâ€), you can not eliminate how others, especially those who care about you, would feel from your own calculation of what suicide means. And as a a consequence, you will feel guilty, because you know that they would feel as devastated as you have felt at your worst. Because your worst has been horrible and you do not actually wish that for anyone else, especially those you care for, and because you can see that they domino of death would hit them very hard, guilt is impossible to avoid.
The real question is whether there is anything that you could do to deal with the unhappiness that does not involve self harm? As in anything, in all the universe of universes, that does not convey the subliminal message: “Yes, I care about you and I know you care about me. But the only meaning in life is pain and death, so whenever you think of me you can ponder pain and death.â€
It is no coincidence that many of the posts here express the hope that others feel guilty for the way they have treated the person contemplating self harm. Self harm includes a huge factor of guilt. Not wanting to feel the guilt, it becomes a legacy for others.
G.W.
Not selfish. I did not want to be brought into this world. Cannot help all the harm and anguish that life has caused me but trying to go back to where I wanted to be (pre-born state, at peace). Suicide is not selfish it is birth that is selfish.
@outrageous your so right! I like the way you think!
@Christina thanks, is true, why don’t people care about how we feel but, yet they care how they will feel after we’re gone.
@ haemie I’m glad someone was able to save your life. My best friend save my life by taking me this far in life.But, sometimes I feel like is hurting her and I don’t want to do that anymore.
@G.W Yeah, I understand and you got a point but, what if your tired of hurting people around you because of your mood swings? I mean what if you put yourself out there to make people happy but, not yourself? So if we were to finally do something for our self and it involves in death, that’s selfish? for doing this to our self? is our choice.
@rach Yes, is not selfish but I don’t think birth is selfish either. We were brought to this world to find something to do and if we try it all and nthing seems to change nor are we happy then we can take our exit and maybe in the next life , start off better.
@empty22 — this person didn’t save my life. She betrayed my trust and then went around telling everyone that she did it to save my life (at a time when my life was not in jeopardy). Her act of sending out the e-mail was pure self-aggrandizement.
No they do not want to live – they want out. Trust their truth and stop imposing your own.
They are pausing to make sure their odds and ends are in place like many suicidal people do. Like marriage – its a huge change and decision. Once its done in suicide there is no divorce – so it makes sense they are trying to get courage enough to do it.
Never assume someone is not suicidal because they are talking about it. That is total BULLSHIT and it is dismissive of their TRUTH. Why not say PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER ALREADY and make them have to prove it for you. JFC
no shit. and they are also releasing themselves from the ability they had to be there for some of us who DID approach and ask for help.
So blame the dead guy. Right?
They cant speak your truth – now that is selfish.
In my case my being alive is bothering my family. They hate me and maybe dont mind if I am alive but dont want me in their lives because I am not elite anymore since my divorce. And they all are. A bunch of child molesting alcoholic addicts and rage addicts with no communication skills. Pass the buck of the family member who was bullied all their life to someone else in a psych ward.
FUCK THEM
BUZZER SOUNDS – WRONG
I DONT WANT TO FEEL
haemie that is vulgarity of that so called savior. GROSS
@haemie Really? wow, I can’t believe there people out there like that. People just love the attention!
@G.W …that is ridiculous….Suicide is not…NOT…selfish….your statement indicates you feel that others have a reasonable and rightful obligation to live for others that they did not bring into this world and that is preposterous….
If I was going to sell my car that I used to give you rides to work is that selfish? How do you have any logical expectation of opinion in anything that belongs to me? To be selfish is to request that others stay alive despite their own issues for your own emotional stability….Peoples body belong to them period…
By your logic anything anybody does based on how they feel is selfish….So if I got a tattoo because I liked it well in your view that is selfish because I only thought about how I would feel about the tattoo I didn’t think about how others may feel about it ….you see how ridiculous that train of thinking is?
I think you may want to review what “selfish” actually means before using it to define suicide
suicide is not selfish. not in the way people quack about it
suicide takes a lot of courage to do because it is permanent. the unknown is more scary than life sometimes. taking onesself out of the life of others because they feel like a problem and burden is not selfish. it is an attempt to get the fuck out of the way of a world that seems to not want them