I’m confused on whether I want to commit or live.
If I live, there is that possibility that life will be how I want it to be in the future, but it could tyrn out shitty like it is now.
If I just commit, it’ll be over.
I won’t have to suffer and struggle anymore.
I just, there are SO MANY positives and negatives with both.
I can never really see my future, when I try to it’s like “Yeah, I’m already gone so..”
BUT when I plan on attempting, I realize I’ll miss the videos my favourite youtubers make
I’ll miss listening to new music made by my favourite bands
I dunno anymore…
I want it all to end..
Suicide or Life?
Suicide. [√]
Life. [no]
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3 comments
If you still have the chance to turn things around and you think you might have a good future, i’d say it could be nice at least trying… if you had no possibility whatsoever of a good future i’d understand, but if you think that things can get better, why not giving it a chance? suicide will always be there if everything fails and at least you’ll know you tried.
I am going through the very same thing that you are, right now. Making decisions, predicting outcomes and having a little eensy-weensy bit of optimism for the future if I do choose to live. It’s good to see you weighing up some pros and cons, it gets you thinking. Don’t dwell on it for too long however, be happy with what you may have now, and what you could acquire in the future. I must agree with you in saying that I’ll miss listening to new music, hell, my life is music I suppose.
You’re young, Miss, and I’m sure there’s a lot of grey in your world right now. Hopefully we here at SP can help brighten it up a bit for you, or at least make things a little clearer for you. 🙂
My thoughts exactly, can’t miss a new youtube video lol. This New Year I was quite serious about going thru with it. I was sitting with a bottle of cyanide in my hand and I knew if I took it I’d be gone for good; and I backed out.
Right now I’m thinking as long as I can tolerate my life I’ll try to stay here, when I can’t anymore there will always be a way out for me. It is not going anywhere. That kinda gives comfort to my mind.