Im done. Im so ready to kill myself. I just want to go on a hike with my good friend 9mm and never return. My desire to die is stronger than my desire to live. Im not sure how I survived so long, maybe it was because Im living for others, but how long can that last? Eventually I have to to be selfish right? Im tired of being suicidal for the past 8 years, I don’t think it will ever get better.
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It is time to be selfish now.
But I say that meaning you need to start living your life for yourself and not others.
If your tired of being suicidal then change it. You have the power to change and influence the outcomes in your life. You have choices, your life does not need to end now, if anything your life could start now.
You decide. Yes life will get hard but it could get better. You will have to fight for everything you get but you will learn to be strong and appreciate each lesson you learn with each struggle. There will be more pain and sorrow, especially when committing to change but remember this change can bring about life and the possibility of happiness.
You survived this long. Why stop now?
Even if you need to leave this road your on and pave a new path to life, why not?
A wonderful young lady once told me,
“It’s not the problem that’s the problem, it’s the attitude about the problemâ€
Meaning that there might not be a solution to every problem, but there are almost always compromises and ways to overcome obstacles even if it requires working around them instead of going over them.
Take care.
^The Koji makes a good case.
Have meds not worked? What is your trigger?