Another day, and I slowly make my way out of the sleep paralysis that seems to come more often now. Then one by one I drag a foot off my bed and plant it on the floor, feeling surprised that I am still alive, but of course not surprised that I still feel so dead… I look over my shoulder towards the spot in which I had laid and observe the blood stains upon my sheets from last nights battle. Another trigger had been pulled and I was wounded, the cuts are getting a little deeper now, it’s also requiring more to simply balance out the chemicals in my brain so I can feel nothing at all. I’ve been dragging the blade closer and closer to my wrist, slowly scratching the surface of my skin becoming more and more tempted to press down. My arteries are pretty visible and big with not much between my blade and them, it wouldn’t take much to slice them open to be honest. Boy what a mess it would make, I would hate for anyone to have to clean that up. I’m sorry in advance….
There is a war going on in my mind, it’s been raging since what little bit I can remember of my childhood, and now it seems it might be coming to an end here shortly, but will I be the victor? Or the defeated? I’m not even sure which side I am on anymore….. I really don’t know anything… anymore…
2 comments
Were all fighting wars ….unfortunately many of us know we are gonna lose ……that’s why when ur in trouble ..ur allies come to help………………but sometimes its not enough… People cannot understand each other if they don’t share the same pain …only through pain can we all truly believe what the other person is feeling
Pain is pain. It dose not matter where it is coming from. We all FEEL it the same way.