really, its real and it never goes, the addiction to think about ways to kill yourself is so strong, i even dream of it, how peacefully my body will lay, how i will leave everything here and how.. all i have done, all people have done to me will disappear. there will be nothingness and i will sink in the ocean of infinite security. i need this place, i need to feel safe from all the fight, all the hatred, all the people.
4 comments
You nailed it. It’s an addiction. People toy with their thoughts for their entire life. They’re addicted and don’t even know it. It’s worse than heroine, cigarettes or alcohol. That’s why I keep coming here, to read other peoples addictive thoughts and therefore give permission for my own addiction. It goes deep and is almost impossible to route out.
yes sooo true ! randall, when im happy i still come here.
Me too.
I was just thinking this before when I was laying in bed. I was thinking “it’s an addiction, I wonder if anyone else sees that”. Then I found this moments later.
We all suffer from the most taboo addiction, and it’s probably the hardest to combat. You can’t just go cold turkey, you can’t run away from it, because the substance you’re addicted to exists permanently in your brain, giving you steady doses all the time.