I really like clawing at my skin, tearing chunks out of my arms, scratching till i bleed, and it stings. It makes me feel calm, Like im in power, Like i have control over everything.
(sorry if this is triggering to anyone)
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3 comments
No it’s not weird. I kind’ve feel the same way. Though I think I prefer seeing my blood over pain. There’s this weird kind of satisfaction from it. I mean I cut, but I won’t be satisfied until it bleeds a lot. Recently I’ve found something else to cut with that’s really sharp, makes me bleed instantly and I don’t feel as much pain. Eh, but that’s just me.
yeah i cut with blades for a while coz i like seeing the blood but i recently did and regret it afterwards, i then thought i was done with self harming i thought id come a step closer to getting better but obviously not because im actually getting worse and i think i just refer the stinging and burning feeling of scratching i actually start smiling when i do it :/
It’s ok, I’m kind of the same. I mean like I said before I prefer seeing my blood more than the pain, but like you I actually start smiling when I start bleeding, or just at thought of cutting as I hold my blade. I feel like I should shake some sense into myself, but really, I can’t =/