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why hate on the hurting?

by haileewantstobehappy

I’m sorry if I drag this on, but I’m not one to hold my tongue when something is bothering me. So I just want to address this for a moment. Why do some people like to make people who are hurting feel worse? I don’t mean everyone, some people help, but others just fuel the flame and worsen the pain. I’m not referencing to myself, even though I’ve been in this situation before a couple too many times. But if someone is in pain, and using a post or blog, video, etc. to vent or rant or cry for help, there are 99.9% of the time those assholes that like to attack them or drag them even farther down. If someone says they want to kill themselves, what would possess someone to say “do it” or “go ahead, no one would care” these are things I’ve witnessed first hand, and it bothers the fuck out of me, yes, I’m sure some people do just say things like that for attention, but most of the time, it’s legit and they’re serious. Suicide and depression and anxiety and self harm and the millions of other mental illnesses out there are all serious and you need to take them seriously. As I said I am only addressing select people here, for those of you who do care you’re great but why are we so fucking rude and absurd to each other? We are all human, and we are all beautiful in my opinion, and I believe that we should help each other the best we can instead of hurt each other because I have seen way too may damn people take their own lives because either no one helped them when they needed it, or they did the opposite of helping. Some of us need to get our shit together. I figure I’m going to get a lot of backlash for this but eh, I’ll deal with it, it’s something I felt the need to address. We need to build each other up, not break each other down. Thank you for reading, have a great day.

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nepheliad 4/9/2016 - 5:23 am

I totally agree; sadly it seems not everyone wants to be sympathetic. If they’ve seen you claim to be suicidal for years but you’re still alive, well, at that point literally no one cares if you still say you’re not doing great. Some people don’t talk about wanting to kill themselves, and boom, they’re dead when you least expect it, but when a person struggles through every day for a long period of time? Old news. It must be their fault. They’re a complainer or attention seeker who can’t get their act together.

The above is not how *I* think, but that’s how I’ve seen pretty much everyone else react to those who are struggling with long-term depression, and mental illness. Yes, even some on this site have spoken that way, which is ironic, because anyone visiting here must have at least considered suicide.

Some people can’t cope the way others can, and every setback only amplifies their problems. Should they receive no compassion? Are their lives worthless and should they just shut up and avoid everyone if they can’t pretend to be constantly happy? I think not. Instead of shutting them out, those they reach out to should try to be more understanding and empathetic. It can be difficult for the average person who has not experienced severe depression/emotional problems to relate with suicidals, but for those who know what’s it like? That can’t be so impossible.

shatterediris 4/9/2016 - 5:54 am

well, most of what you see on many places of the internet really is not surprising, suicide and self harm are commonly used themes for humour. Which I am rather guilty of too…. I generally don’t assume the people who encourage others to kill themselves are really that serious, some probably are but I’m sure most aren’t. I have not seen a lot of that behavior in person, generally people seem very disturbed when somebody around them speaks of these topics in a serious manner. And at least the vast majourity don’t harrass the person directly due to it…. Still they don’t exactly seem nice…. I have no idea what I’m getting at now, or what my point was -_- opps….

PhantomCitizen43 4/9/2016 - 11:02 am

I agree FULLY with you that its not right to hate on the hurting…. and its also not right to try and encourage somebody to commit suicide or harm themselves. It certainly isn’t right.
But I have to say that I have been coming to this site. The SP Forum for a long time (over a year) and I have to say that I don’t see people hating on the forum here. I don’t see people injuring others who are suicidal or depressed people here. A few times I have seen it > but or the most part I see a lot of compassion at this forum and people banning together to help each other out and that is why I come here so much.

So I dont know where you are seeing these kinds of things… but I have to say I don’t see a lot of it going on at this site. If that kind of thing was going on at this site… I would report it to the moderators and I believe those kinds of posts would be removed

If you are in fact seeing behavior like that in other places on the web > then YES I have to say that kind of stuff does exist out there. There are some cruel people in the world who do that and YES it is NOT right. But I don’t know what to tell you. Unfortunately there are cruel people out there… that is why you have to be careful where you go and what you do and try to avoid people and places that do that.
thanks for your post and for being concerned

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