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item 1/2 should be en route

by blank-clutter

After a long time of planning and wishing for death,

after a long time of procrastination. I might be ready to go.

My conclusion of life right now is looking to be that, I had a chance.

I had a chance to be happy, successful, have lots of friends, and have a good life. I tried, I shouldnt feel bad if I failed at the end, because I at least expressed what was in me to the world. It just happened that what was in me was not good or compatible. So in a way I did my part.


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4beyondhelp 5/20/2016 - 11:48 pm

I’m glad you feel peaceful about your life. I hope it won’t rub you the wrong way that I hope you don’t die.

blank-clutter 5/20/2016 - 11:50 pm

nah its fine, I get how people are. I kind of wish that things would be good too but that wont happen just by me choosing not to die. What im trying to say is that its about life problems instead of just the choice to die

4beyondhelp 5/21/2016 - 12:12 am

I’m sorry. There is always the chance that things would be good, but of course that’s not guaranteed either. If it means anything, I’d like to add that I disagree with the idea that you’re not good or compatible with the world. I think you are good. Maybe you are not compatible with your current environment, or your environment(s) in the past. But I don’t believe that makes you incompatible with the world. (and hey, if nothing else, you’re compatible here :))

blank-clutter 5/21/2016 - 12:15 am

thanks so much!

turquoise 5/21/2016 - 6:19 am

I feel exactly the same way. Every word in that order. Well said.

gkks 5/21/2016 - 7:26 am

Reading your post is like you were describing my life. I was kind of shocked knowing another person has the exact same problems as i. Don’t want to pull cliches like “life is beautiful” and “don’t do it man”. Just hope you thought this thought and make sure what you do is the best for you.

rocketman 5/21/2016 - 9:06 am

blank-clutter, Did it once you can do it again. 🙂 and be better at it!!

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