It’s terrible. There is a huge difference in being and feeling a certain way. When you feel ugly people compliment you and you don’t believe them. When you are ugly there are no other people at all. When you feel irrelevant your friends dont communicate with you or always include you. When you are irrelevant there are no other people at all. When you feel ugly you wonder what anyone sees in you. When you are ugly there no other people at all. I’m tired of being ugly and being teirrelevant and being inconsequential to existing. I can’t fathom how crazy the world is and i cant get out of my own way. Ive hated living for nearly 30 years and it isn’t getting better. Im praying for the nerve to blow my brains out. End this pain and end everything. I don’t have any compelling story i don’t interact with the world in any meaningful way and I’m fucking beyond fed up.
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2 comments
its so hard to live in a society where beauty is only skin deep. I don’t put much stock into looks because as my husband put it I’m a solid “4”. Whatever that means, you have a beautiful soul that is just crying out because no one is willing to take the time to see your inner beauty. I wish we were all blinded to outer beauty and could only see the beauty of ones soul, things would really change then. Stay strong and know that there will be someone that will be able to see your inner beauty!
Unfortunately my entire life have taught me that is not the case at all. Your husband is a dick by the way