At some point im going to get a gun in the near future. I live with family now so i dont need every dollar anymore. Im at the gym now with motivation what so ever. I may very well leave despite just getting here. I can go home cut myself and chill. I used to have the position that a gun purchase would dent my finances so much so that it would nearly necessitate an immidiate attempt. Now i can get a gun and kill myself at my leisure. I also have a bridge to jump off of while doing it to guarantee death. One of these days soon will be my last and ill no longer have the misery of existing anymore.
4 comments
I’ve always thought about shooting myself while jumping off a cliff. It’s a calming thought because you know if you chicken out pulling the trigger, at least you know you can fall to your death. Maybe even chain an exit bag to the head so even if fall doesn’t kill, suffocation will.
opps. I broke one of the rules… Here’s the obligatory, “Please don’t do it, there’s so much to live for!” comment. Ha.
If it means anything to you, at this very moment I understand your pain. Really, I do.
I appreciate your comment including the obligatory part. I feel its sort of grey area honestly. Were not discussing the efficacy instructions of the methods but rather the ideation and (hopefully in my case) execution of them
Very well thought out plan for ending your pain I could never get myself to use a weapon so I ***** out each time and fight throught the pain while I mature and finally do it.
I am sorry to hear that things have gotten so bad for you that you have come to this. BUT I fully understand where you are coming from. Me I want to do it. I want to end it all someday…. but I am just hanging in there for now to complete some bucket list items. I like the idea of the firearm… because I have tried pills and overdoses and so forth and those methods usually dont work. I have come to discover that if you really want to do it… you need something l like a gun to do it. I have very little to live for…. and I get closer to wanting to try to end it again every moment.
Well I hope things turn around for the better for you. I hope whatever is causing you to want to end it stops.. and I hope things get well for you. But I know that people have to do what they have to do. I wish you peace.